Behind the Bastards

There’s a reason the History Channel has produced hundreds of documentaries about Hitler but only a few about Dwight D. Eisenhower. Bad guys (and gals) are eternally fascinating. Behind the Bastards dives in past the Cliffs Notes of the worst humans in history and exposes the bizarre realities of their lives. Listeners will learn about the young adult novels that helped Hitler form his monstrous ideology, the founder of Blackwater’s insane quest to build his own Air Force, the bizarre lives of the sons and daughters of dictators and Saddam Hussein’s side career as a trashy romance novelist.

Part One: Hitler's Sex Life: The Whole Sad Story

Part One: Hitler's Sex Life: The Whole Sad Story

Tue, 26 Feb 2019 11:00

Part One: Hitler's Sex Life: The Whole Sad Story

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Hey, Robert here. It's been like two months since I had LASIK and I'm still seeing 2020. All I had to do was go in for a consultation, then go in for a maybe 10 minute procedure and then my eyes have been great ever since. You know, I healed up wonderfully. It was very simple, couldn't have been a better experience. So if you want to explore LASIK plus I can't recommend it enough. They have over 20 years experience in the industry and they performed more than two million treatments right now if you want to try getting LASIK plus you can get $1000 off of your surgery when you're treated in September, that's $500. Of per eye, just to schedule your free consultation. Hello, I'm Erica Kelly from the podcast Southern Fried true crime. And if you want to go from podcast fan to podcast host, do what I did and check out spreaker from iheart. I was working in accounting and hating it. Then after just 18 months of podcasting with Spreaker, I was able to quit my day job. Follow your podcasting dreams. Let's breaker handle the hosting, creation, distribution, and monetization of your podcast. Go to That's Hey there, it's Ebony Monet, your co-host for the San Diego Zoo's Amazing Wildlife podcast. In this special episode, we're speaking with Doctor Jane Goodall about the fascinating journey that led to her impactful behavioral discoveries on chimpanzees. It wasn't until one of the chimpanzees began to lose his fear of me, but I began to really make discoveries that actually shook the scientific world. Listen to amazing wildlife on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. Yeah. Introduction. I'm Robert Evans. This is behind the ******** podcast. We tell you everything you don't know about the very worst people in all of history. With me today is Brandy Posey. Hello. How you doing, Brandy? I'm doing pretty great. Excited to get into this. Brandy, you are a stand up comedian. Get any puggles to kick off at the start here. Uh, yeah, I tore around quite a bit. You can go to Brandy with an IE, Posey with an EY. For all of my tour dates. I also have a podcast called Lady to Lady that is a very, very fun. We've had a lot of really awesome past guests like Margaret Cho and French Stewart, so come check that out too. Normally we work all that out ahead of time and I introduce it, but Sophie isn't here. And as you can tell, like everything, everything's a nightmare. It's OK you. You have like a terror in your eyes. No, it's it's horrifying. The thought of of not knowing what to do. I don't know how to do. I don't know what we're going to do. Add breaks. This is this is the end for all of us. Do you want me to count something down for you? No, no, I should I put on a Sophie wig of some kind of that what will calm your nerves properly for this recording, the the only possible thing to do in the face of chaos is to just completely yield to the chaos and give up even trying to structure the show. Perfect. Sounds great. Yeah, I think that's, I think that's the plan. OK. Explains why you're standing on the table. Yeah, yeah. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. Now, Brandy? Yes. Today we have a subject that is near and dear to no one's hearts, but more important than I think a lot of people give it credit to. Today we're talking about how Hitler ******. Ooh, so glad you called me for this one. I'm flattered that. Well, I mean, we had you wanted to talk about Stalin and his, his, his love of pranks and absolutely deejaying and drinking more than anyone else now and ******* Hitler feels like a prank. Yeah, well, maybe or maybe not. I can't my my predictions out of the gate. Can I give a prediction before we get into this? Very curious for that. Not a generous lover. OK, and also gonna say this, I'm not going to shame somebody for having a small penis cause that is outside of your control. But real angry guy, I have a feeling he probably has a little little guy. The funny thing about Hitler, because Hitler Hitler's like the one person people have talked about more than any other single person in history. More has been written about him and what not everything you just talked about the possibility of a micropenis, the possibility he was not a generous lover. This has all been debated by like. Elderly scholars from Stanford and Cambridge Atlink like, that's one of the fun things about Hitler studies is that, like, yeah, that question about whether or not he had a micropenis like the CIA's weighed in. Like, it's it's a thing, of course, like the imagine dedicating your career to that. Like, mom, Dad, I'm majoring in Hitler ****. Well, just Hitler studies in general. If you're going to be into Hitler studies, you're going to have some questions about *** ****. Yeah, **** pH. **** ** Hitler's *******. This is not going to be the most adult. Episode in certain points, but I'm good with that. I think you'll be surprised where it goes. I pretty well I do like that in front of me on the table while recording, we do have a product called Purina busy Bone, which is just right on the table in front of me. Speaking of busy Bones, Hitler's it's debatable. It's all very, very heavy. Bone didn't get very busy. Lazy bone. It's possible his bone got a lot busier than people give him credit for. There's a lot of debate around this topic. There's even a lot of debate about the nature of his genitals, in addition to the question. But like the the OSS, the precursor to the CIA, talked a lot about, like, whether or not he had a micropenis. Based on some interviews with some people, there's a hypothesis that a goat bit off *** **** when he was very young and that that was the secret of his madness, that he goat bit *** ****. Want that to be true that a lot of people did like you again? Where's that elder statue? I mean, we don't want to. We don't want to celebrate that goat. That's the secret to Hitler's madness. Yeah. I mean, that's true. That's true now, and we're not gonna get into much of that. There's also a theory that he had one ball and there was like a song during the war. Hitler has only got one ball. Goering has two, but very small. Nana, Nana, Nana. That was like a British Diddy, but there were real rumors about it. Is is that where that that melody comes from or is that a weird AL parody about it was, I mean, weird Al hadn't been conceived of yet. Like it was a it was a parody of, of that, like tune. Just an easy tune. Mix a song too, for sure. There's testicles. I just wanted to make sure that that wasn't like what that original song was. So it was like, how is that not a fact? In my lexicon at this point, we have interviews with a couple of different doctors who, you know, palpated Hitler's genitals because that's what doctors do. And they all say perfectly normal. So there, there's no hard evidence of that. But it has been debated a lot. And I do think it's important that people know for historical context that when bombs were raining down on London, yes, people were comforting themselves with songs about Hitler and goering's genitalia. Yeah, that's yeah, I'm pretty into that for sure. It's great. It's great. Nothing cuts to the core quite like a parody song. No, it doesn't. Let's dive deeper into this. Let's get in there. Let's just get on in there. So, as you might guess by the fact that I wasn't even holding up my notes for that whole discussion about Hitler's genitalia and the rumors about it, I am what you might call a Hitler nerd. I've read enough biographies of the man that I've started reading books about Hitler biographies that are essentially comparing all of the different biographies of Hitler. And like, like biographies about writing biographies about Hitler. It's a problem. Yeah. Yeah. It's not good. Do you have like a is it like a shelf in your house or do you have like a, a cloth in front of it? You know, I own a couple of physical copies, but I I I for the show, I get too many books. Like, I I just have everything on Kindle. Like, OK, I usually am buying sometimes two or three in a week, like it should just take too long. It's better to have that all digital. Well, although I think if you were to actually see the titles laid out in front of you physically, you'd be like, oh, there's things that would be that would be nicer, but it would, I think it would take a lot longer to put together. Episodes fair. OK. But the point of this is that I I tend to be on the the cutting edge of new Hitler research in terms of like, what I'm reading. I'm not doing new Hitler research, but I I still have Google. Learn it. Yeah, that's so. Speaking of that, a couple of days ago I was actively looking for a new Hitler facts to just see if any had come out in the last couple of months since I checked that. Yeah. And I came across an article in the independent called Hitler was a sexually confused serial killer, psychologist claims and new book. So that's that's quite a claim. So I think you can also probably just say serial killer because I think most serial killers have got, you know, their wires crossed. Yeah. I mean it's interesting the term confused. Or serial killer. Because I wonder if, like, a guy like Ted Bundy probably wouldn't be like, no, I wasn't confused. I just. This is what I wanted to do. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. The, the confusion came from wherever the wiring crossed in the 1st place. Yeah. He's very matter of fact about. Yeah. And the, the book that apparently makes these claims is titled Hitler won and Hitler 2, the sexual no man's land. It's by a best selling German author and psychiatrist named Volcker, Ellis Pilgrim. And is that like a new like, that's a very dark cat in the hat. Hitler one and Hitler two. Yeah. The cat in the hat go and they just. Hitler wanted Hitler two. Yeah, they can do anything. Anything. Oh no, under the sun and red. It's a white supremacist parody right there. Yeah, for sure. Yeah, some some Nazi listening in is already hard at work on that. Not the Doctor Seuss version. I haven't gotten to read that book because it's only in German and I do not read German, which is almost the title of a great podcast. There's podcast cut called I don't speak German about the alt right that people should listen to if they want. It's kind of like my show, but way more focused on that one narrow group of people. Great podcast anyway. And don't read German. Yeah, I don't read German. Podcast is called I don't speak German. Cool anyway. Couldn't find the book, but I did find some claims that are in the book. In this article, Hitler was a Adolf Hitler was a sexually confused serial killer whose violence was driven by lust. In his new book, Mr Volcker claims the Nazi leader had an orgasm while watching a film in which Austrian soldiers massacre French troops. Now this kind of story is a treat for me because I've never heard of this particular Hitler story before. I'm always, I'm always looking out for some new, some new H facts. So quote he quotes Marianne Hoppe, an actress who was an acquaintance of Hitler. Grabbing a time that she went to the cinema in the dictator's Berlin Palace to watch a film called The Rebel. It featured Austrian troops hurling boulders from a mountain onto the French below. Hitler got some kind of thrill and rubbed his knees at this event as the stones rolled down on the French and groaned. I don't know if he was crazy, but he got some kind of orgasm, she said. I wanted to leave during the show. The man was creepy. Yeah, that's people gave Pee-wee Herman a hard time. People gave Pee-wee Herman a hard time. You know, Hitler in in in perspective. Yeah. If you compare the two, people should get the statue. I feel like we should have just been left to masturbate in that theater. But that's what that theater was for. It's what theater was for. It's not like he was showing up at the Cinemark to like to showing of anyway. Yeah. Yeah. I've been unable to find an English translation. But in this article, Mr, which apparently talked to the author, Pilgrim talks about how he suspects there's a connection. In sexuality and violence in Hitler and that his sexual excitement at the thought of violence gave him the desire to force men into killing, he says. However, since this lust for killing is the decisive feature of serial killers, the question inevitably arises, was Hitler a serial killer who murdered for the purpose of his gratification? Hitler's sexuality, I believe, drove the dictator into the most colossal annihilation that man has witnessed. Now that's that's this guy's claims and interesting premise. Interesting premise. I can see why a lot of people would want to believe that. Yeah. Mr Pilgrim also speculates about Hitler's sex life, claiming he abstained from sexual relations with his mistress and then wife, Eva Brown. Now, this all sounds, I think, to a lot of people. They might read this and be like, OK, well, this this seems, you know, of course he was crazy. Maybe that makes him he was just a serial killer who wound up in charge of a country. Yeah, I get why people would want to believe that. I think what most people looking at that wouldn't dig into is kind of where the guy is basing his claims on. And most of them come from a dude called Ernst Hanfstaengl other nickname was Putsy. And Ernst was a classic boots, classic Putsy. Ernst was a friend of Hitler's back in the day who then started hating him. And I'm sure that happened with a lot of Hitler's friend that happened here. We're not great at keeping friends. Not super good at friends. I'll be like, oh, God, just do I have to answer, keep answering this call. I think that might surprise a lot of people. Not a good friend. Yeah. Not dictators in general. Not great friends. No, not so much. Not not. They just take and they take and they take. They take and they take and they take. Some of them are fun to drink with. Yeah, once or twice. Yeah. Like, if I could go back in time and just see Stalin and all of his buddies, what, how drunk they of course I would want to try. I wouldn't want to be drunk around Hitler. But Hitler didn't get drunk. He was a teetotaler. Right. Was a teetotaler. Yeah. I mean, he was on meth a lot, but that was a doctor giving it to him. Yeah. So he. Yeah. He. So he thought that he was being medicated. He thought that. And that was, you know that when we talked about that. And there's a great book called Blitzed about that. And I'm sure we'll talk about it someday, but, like, that was mostly later in the war, like during his rise to power. He's sober. Like, every now and then you'll hear a story of him drinking like part of a glass of. Campaign. But he was like, yeah, yeah. Which is, you know, control freaks and whatnot. So I I get the, the, the desire to, like, psychoanalyze Hitler. But going to Hampsten angle for, like, advice because hospital has long time been claiming that Hitler was basically a neuter, was like, couldn't get off. Yeah, yeah. Had like, no sexual life. Well, and that is a thing with a lot of serial killers where, like, they just can't come until they find the thing that makes them right. Yeah. And and if you think of Hitler as a serial killer, yeah, a lot of this stuff makes sense. But I think what most people don't realize when they hear stories like this, you get every year or two there will be a new rash of Hitler's sex life stories that little hit, like kind of shadier but not entirely ******** outlets and stuff. And then every now and then, someone like the New York will give it a write up or whatnot. None of this is new in the field of Hitler, urology, and in fact, like. All of these claims, any claim that you like, read about and like, a modern paper about, like, Hitler liking to poop on people or the possibility that Hitler was gay, all that stuff was, yeah. Kicking around in the 1930s. Yeah. So there, there's a lot of myths around this guy. And So what I want to kind of do today is first give kind of an overview of the the myths that people are still telling about Hitler on kind of the latest couple of waves of this, and then we're going to do a really deep dive into his whole sexual history. His relationships, everything that there is about him in like reputable Scott, like scholarship. So jeez. So if you if you and Hitler matched on Tinder and you wanted to Google him to find out what was really going on, this would be the episode to listen to. This would be the episode to listen to. And, you know, spoiler alert, don't date Hitler. No, don't date Hitler. No, don't. Probably not gonna go well. Yeah. So back in like March of 2016, I came across an article in the Daily Star with the title Adolf Hitler was gay. And love teenage boys. CIA files claim there was also a New York Post article around the same time with the title Adolf Hitler had a truly disgusting sexual fetish. It's equally emblematic of like, those types of articles. Yeah, these were all like spring of 2016 wave articles and they were all based on a dossier. The OSS, which is like a precursor to the CIA, put together a quote from the New York Post. The Nazi leaders bedroom habits included a love of poo sex claims the dossier from the office of Yeah, so which is what? That not dressing up like Winnie the Pooh. Not dressing up like Winnie the Pooh and looking for honey? Yeah, the intelligent document says that he liked women to stand over him and defecate because he was turned on by poo. This is the New York Post keeps using the word poo instead of feces, which just doesn't seem like great journalism. It also revealed the furor had a micropenis and, as the famous song suggests, only one testicle. It also revealed he liked to be brutally kicked by women as part of his sex games. So again, this is always presented whenever it comes up in the media is new. This is all older than your grandparents. It's been around forever. Been around forever. Yeah, for sure. This yeah. Yeah. So the root of most of the salacious Hitler **** myths is that infamous OS report titled The Mind of Adolf Hitler was compiled by a doctor named ******. And it was initially a secret thing that was, like, written up as a a brief for FDR at the start of World War Two. It's based on a lot of interviews and original documents and the source book behind the paper, which is like all of the raw sources that they compiled to write. This is a gold mine event, though, but we should be really critical about the dossier itself. It has to be taken with as much salt as you prescribed something written by a psychologist in the 1940s, because it's filled with really debatable conclusions based on bad psychoanalytic theory. I'm going to read you one excerpt where Doctor ****** tries to explain why Hitler always carried around a whip as a young man. Quote anyone who has ever seen Hitler talking in a bashful and puerile way to a woman would easily be led to believe that in marriage he would be the underdog, but that is manifestly wrong. It would seem that the whip plays some mysterious role in his relationship to women and doctor Cedric's opinion during the almost 15 years of association with Hitler, the whip with which Hitler loves to gesticulate figures as a kind of substitute or auxiliary symbol for his missing sexual potency. All this wielding of the whip seems to be connected with a hidden desire on the part of Hitler for some state of erection which would overcome his fundamental. Sexual inferiority complex. The truth is that Hitler is in all probabilities, still in the stage of puberty and still in the essential meaning of the word a virgin. I wanna take that guy to a Ren fest. Yeah, this is just, just take a look around. What do you make of this? Yeah. What do you think is going on here? And when he references Dr Sedgwick, that's Han Stangel. Yeah. So he's this is again, all based on that. A lot of this is based on that guy stuff. But like Hitler, Hitler was definitely not a virgin in 1942. No, no, no, no, no. For sure. How how old was he when he went into World War One? Do you know? Because he was in his mid 20s. Yeah. He was in the trenches the whole time. Yeah. Yeah. OK. I got you. So probably. Not even a virgin at that point? That's debatable. We'll get into that a little bit. So just as we kind of criticized that whips were really common among German fascists to be used as weapons and street fights at this time, and Hitler used his whip in street fights a lot. He also used it to flirt with girls a lot. So we'll talk about that some. I think that's pretty cool. It was pretty ********. Do you have like a drive by whipping back in the day? It was more like a bunch of guys that would give speeches in these like beer halls because that's a big thing in German culture. And like a bunch of anti fascists would crowd around them and like they would start throwing bottles and fighting and like ******* Hitler would pull out his whip and start like swinging whips at people and stuff. And you can **** a dude up with. Yeah, you can. Decent with it. Holy ****. It's a good weapon if you're going to like, beat on somebody in a bar. Yeah, and it it worked for that purpose. Give Antifa all the whips now. Yeah, yeah. I mean. They take a lot of training, but yeah, yeah, yeah. I like Indiana Jones reclaiming the whip for the. Yeah. Not fascist side of things. I appreciate that. I never heard the Hitler whip thing. He Hitler loved whips. You're going to be hearing a lot about Hitler's whip today. OK, gotcha. Yeah. So anyway, because of all of this misinformation, because of all of these, like, conclusions that people still tried out based on, like, ******* 1940 psychoanalytic theory, I have gone through two different Hitler biographies. The ones I considered probably the two best. John totland. And he and kershaws, as well as a great book called explaining Hitler. That's like a synthesis of a bunch of different biographies. And I've tried to present what I think is the most complete picture of the verifiable facts of Hitler sex life. So anyway, if we're going to understand how Hitler ****** and how people talk about how Hitler ****** we have to start with Hitler sexual prehistory, what we know about how his dad ****** or to be more precise, who his dad ******. So, well, his mom at least. Definitely. His mom definitely. That's a given at least at least twice. Right. Because he had a sister, younger sister or something, right? Yeah. I think she was 1/2 sister, you know, I don't remember that off the top of my head. He his his genealogy is very complicated. Yeah. So there was like a younger. There was a girl in a room in his house. Girl. Yeah. Paula Hitler, he had a, he had a sister. And he actually, like, one of the nice things Hitler did in his life is that as a younger man, he gave her his, his inheritance. OK and, like, wound up kind of on the street as a result of that because she had a kid and stuff. Yeah, OK, so one thing we leave out a lot when we talk about Hitler's rise to power is the army of crusading journalists who fought a desperate battle to stop him from taking control. They have failed, obviously, and a lot of them died. But for a while their investigation scared Hitler more than anything. He was frightened that his family history would be exposed when he learned about one of the first of these investigations, he allegedly told a party member, people must not know who I am. They must not know where I come from. Now, there are a lot of different rumors as to why. The most salacious rumors that Hitler secretly had a Jewish background. Yeah, we don't know for certain who his father's father was. His grandmother, Maria Schicklgruber, was a 42 year old unmarried serving woman when she gave birth to his father, Alois, in 1836. Some legends say a wealthy Jewish man or a nobleman impregnated her. We don't know the church she was baptized in and the entire town where she was born. Dollar Shime was obliterated by German artillery, probably on Hitler's orders in order to conceal his background. Which is serious warlord. Move right there. I'll give it to you. Erased the shekel. Proverse yeah, yeah. Get get rid of that ****. Grandma's one of those things. One of those few places you'll catch, like a lot of really serious historians speculating is like, would it have even been possible for a guy with the last name schicklgruber to have done the things that Hitler did? Because it was kind of like chance that he wound up with the last name Hitler. Like his dad adopted it from another guy who probably wasn't his dad's. It's a messy case. Heidler was the original name and then they changed it to Hitler. I see. OK, and I have trouble imagining how Shickel Gruber working out because people keep stumbling over it. Shake, shake, shake, Gruber. It'd be like if Google had pet, if their name had been, like, question ask. Yeah, yeah, exactly. You just probably wouldn't have worked as well. No, it definitely would not. Yeah. So historians debate over the exact nature of the genealogy further back than Hitler's dad. But his dad was a *******. Maybe we don't. We don't even know that much. All of this is still debated. Got it. The odds that Hitler was ashamed of a secret Jewish person in his past, though, are lower than the odds that he was just worried people would find out his dad was gross. Alois Hitler was a mid level customs official in Brownlow, Austria. He'd been respected in the local community, but his middle management image belied the reality of a man. Repeatedly married children. Eloise is cool, cool. Here it is. So it's wondering, when pedophiles are going to be a part of the story, they will be a part of this story all the way through. Well, how am I not surprised by that? Great Nazis and gross sexual stuff? Wow. Yeah, everybody focuses on the possibility that there was poo sex. The stuff that we know is so much grosser than pooping. Like, that's whatever you people who are perfectly fine can enjoy that sort of thing. What we're talking about with Hitler and his dad, both cases ****** ** objectively. You can. You can have consensual poo, sex, whatever. Nothing the matter with whatever. Just clean your own sheets, clean your own sheets, or pay your cleaning lady incredibly well. Yes. You know, I'm sure there's some people who take that job. So Eloise's first wife was much, much older than him, and she died after a few years of marriage. Some of the rumors are that he married her for her money, which, whatever, while Eloise was married. But while his first wife was sick, he moved a 16 year old girl into their home to be his serving maid. This girl, Clara. Was his niece now cool? Cool loser. What a ******* loser. Now John Toland, who's one of the preeminent Hitler biographers of all times, says that Clara was hot quote with abundant dark hair. He claims that she was quote installed with the Hitlers at an end where allowance was already carrying on an affair with the kitchen maid Francisca. So when Alloways's first wife is alive, he's got this 16 year old niece who he's hitting on. And also this like 17 year old. Kitchen maid named Francesca, both of whom he's like starting up a thing with while his first wife is alive and dying. So when his first wife died, Aloise got her money and married Francisca. I'm going to quote now from the fantastic book explaining Hitler. After his first wife died, developments in the Alois Hitler household began to take on the appearance of a maimed French farce. After a period of living Conjugally but without the benefit of clergy, and with the kitchen maid, while simultaneously enjoying the services of the even younger maid and niece Clara, he married the older one. Well, good for him, good for him. Picking that. It's 17 year old, not the 16 year old, I guess. How old is he at this point? He is in his 40s. Now, according to John Toland, Francisco was quote only too aware of how tempting a pretty maid could be to the success to the susceptible alloys. After the wedding, the first thing she did was get rid of Clara. Luckily for Eloise, his second wife soon died, allowing him to finally realize his true dream of marrying his teenage niece. Wow, do you know how? How did Francesca? It was cancer. It was a lot of cancer in the Hitler family tree. He was kind of scared about his whole life. Not enough. Not enough, not enough cancer among the Hitlers. Some juvenile leukemia would have really dealt with some problems for the world. Pretty great. Not often I stand for juvenile leukemia, but for Hitler. Get up in them bones, them bones sticking out. Ohh, so the only thing getting in the way of Alois Hitler and his true love with his teenage niece was the fact that they were very close relatives. They officially share the same grand uncle, Johann Georg Hiedler. Now, even in the late 1800s, marrying your teenage niece was sort of frowned upon. Yeah, yeah, I could see that. This is not one of those things where no is normal at the time. Everybody's marrying their 16 year old serving girl niece. No, always had to get special dispensation from the Pope to marry. And continue ******* his knee. He wanted to **** his niece so bad he got papal approval. Oh my God, that's that's Hitler's dad. Uh. Just dear Pope, dear Pope. I guess my my niece. You got to see this girl. Let me send you a couple of pictures. I drew some creatures. Just because you chose to be celibate doesn't mean I need to be a celibate. And I'd like to break that with a child. With a child related to, related to and kind of morally responsible to. Can I give a thumb? Can I get a thumbs up? Thumbs up, thumbs down? What's Catholicism say? And the Pope just said go for it. Go for it? Yeah. Hitler's dad had every official papal permission. The **** is nice. All popes are great. All never done anything wrong. What a great thing to exist. A Pope. So Hitler was Catholic or Hitler. Hitler didn't really give a **** one. I mean, he he was a hitleresque. Yeah. Like technically, I guess on on the on paper, yeah. And at that point in Austria, you're not going to not, you got to be straight with the Catholic Church. Yeah, it's Australia. It's Austria in the late 1800s. And guilt **** worked into him. I mean, he might have. I assumed there were a lot. I assume there was talk. I assume people were like, that's kind of ****** ** right? But I feel so bad about ******* my niece child. I don't know if he did, but I'm going to guess. People in town. There were some, like, but, you know, those people all died of typhus, you know? So we don't know what they were talking about. Just give her all that mastriano. OK, so to make things even creepier, according to Ron Rosenbaum's explaining Hitler quote, even after the Vatican granted the dispensation, Clara continued to call her new husband. What she called him when she was still his maid. Mistress, uncle. So Hitler's mom called his dad uncle the whole time Hitler was a kid. That's worse than when parents call each other mother and father. Yeah, that's grosser than. That's like Mike Pence **** on another. Yeah. Yeah. Ohg. Yeah. My uncle. Yeah. It's gross. It's really gross. Really ******* nasty. Yeah. This is the relationship Adolf Hitler was born into. So I'm not going to say in fairness to Hitler, because you don't give Hitler credit for anything because he's Hitler, but as a baby, that's a rough situation to land in. Yeah. Also, this is some classic uncle ********. Yeah. You always got a good uncle and a bad uncle. He's always like when you got a bad uncle. It's nothing worse than a bad uncle. Hitler's dad was like the platonic. Ideal of a bad uncle, like the uncle that everyone's like. Can he not come because he may not have him around? Please just cut that uncle out of everything. OK, so Hitler's dad marries two women that Hitler biographer Ian Kershaw describes as young enough to be his children. As a dad, he's remembered generally as a strict authoritarian figure, but most people who knew the family when his dad was alive say that Aloise wasn't, you know, particularly violent or bad by the standards of the time towards his kid or his wife. We would probably almost. Certainly called the discipline that Hitler endured child abuse today, but it was not out of the norm for the area. And most of the boys in Austria who grew up around Hitler didn't grow up to be Hitler. So you don't want to put too much influence on the fact that his dad was an authoritarian. But a lot of the boys around Hitler did grow up to be Nazis. So let's not discount the impact of authoritarian parenting either. Yeah, but it's probably not what we're looking for. Looking for the whole reason Hitler went all crazy, the fact that his dad hit him sometimes, yeah, exactly. It's like, that's not going to be that doesn't. That's a real AZ. Yeah yeah, exactly. You're you're leaving out some stuff if you if you drop it down to that. My uncle father. My uncle father. Uncle dad. Hit me. My uncle daddy. Jesus. Oh, Hitler. So we're going to dig into Hitler as a young man in his early love affairs. Great. And spoilers there is creepy as everything else in this podcast is going to be. I'm not surprised if you thought Hitler the dad was bad. Yeah, there's no way like Hitler Adolf is like a lothario coming from this place at all. No, what's surprising is how much like Elliot Rodger he is. I'm not surprised by that ******* horse he is. Like ******* losers. These ******* losers. God, of course that is the overwhelming thing that you say to yourself when you get into some real deep study of the Nazis. Is these ******* losers all you can say? Losers uh you know who's not losers though? Brandy who the wonderful sponsors who support this show and or program with their products and or services and or add Petro dollar ad money I I'm spinning out of control here products. Mint Mobile offers premium wireless starting at just 15 bucks a month. And now for the plot twist. Nope, there isn't one meant. Mobile just has premium wireless from 15 bucks a month. There's no trapping you into a two year contract. You're opening the bill to find all these nuts fees. There's no luring you in with free subscriptions or streaming services that you'll forget to cancel and then be charged full price for none of that. For anyone who hates their phone Bill, Mint Mobile offers premium wireless for just $15.00 a month. Mint Mobile will give you the best rate whether you're buying. Or for a family. And it meant family start at 2 lines. All plans come with unlimited talk and text, plus high speed data delivered on the nation's largest 5G network. You can use your own phone with any mint mobile plan and keep your same phone number along with all your existing contacts. Just switch to Mint mobile and get premium wireless service starting at 15 bucks a month. Get premium wireless service from just $15.00 a month and no one expected plot twist at That's Seriously, you'll make your wallet. Very happy at Mint Mobilcom behind now a word from our sponsor better help. If you're having trouble stuck in your own head, focusing on problems dealing with depression, or just you know can't seem to get yourself out of a rut, you may want to try therapy, and better help makes it very easy to get therapy that works with your lifestyle and your schedule. A therapist can help you become a better problem solver, which can make it easier to accomplish your goals, no matter how big or small they happen to be. So if you're thinking of giving therapy. Try better help is a great option. It's convenient, accessible, affordable, and it is entirely online. You can get matched with a therapist after filling out a brief survey, and if the therapist that you get matched with doesn't wind up working out, you can switch therapists at any time when you want to be a better problem solver therapy can get you there. Visit behind today to get 10% off your first month. That's better Better helcom behind hey, Robert Evans here. It's been like two months since I got LASIK laser eye surgery and my vision still 2020. So many things about my daily life has changed. I don't have to worry about putting on a mask and my glasses fogging up and have to take out contacts at night or put them in the day. I don't have to, like, worry all the time when I'm traveling. Like, how many contacts do I have by going swimming at the lake during the summer? Something I like to do, go to the beach or whatever. I don't have to worry about losing a contact or, you know, bringing swimming glasses. Or something. With me, everything is just easier. And getting it done was easy too. You know? I went in, I had my consultation. They told me I was a good candidate. And then I went back in a couple of days later. But a Bing bada boom? You know, my eyes were perfect. So LASIK Plus is a leader in laser vision correction in the United States. They have over 20 years in the industry and more than two million treatments performed. If you want to start your LASIK plus journey, you can get $1000 off when treated in September. That's 500 per eye. So visit my LASIK. to schedule your free consultation now. We're back. Boy, I love those products. Hate Hitler, hate those hats as much as I hate him. Exactly. And there's nothing that's a squeegee for your brain as well as a solid product or a just a nice service, especially on like a hot Hitler, full day. Just like being told the possibility, the possibilities. You know, when Nazis didn't like possibilities? Of course not. But that's what you get with products and services is possibilities. Lot of good economic discourse coming out of this episode. You should write a book. Let's write another Hitler book. There aren't enough of them. There should be a couple more Hitler books. OK, so most of our what Hitler think about Squarespace? Yeah. What would why would Hitler think about Squarespace? I don't like zip free speech of the Internet. You know, I hate to say this because it's what I do to make my living, but Hitler would 1000% be a podcaster if you were around today. Absolutely. I mean, he, like, wrote at length about how the best way, the only real way to convince anyone of anything was with the human voice. Yeah, and, like, the power of, like, radio to isolate someone with a voice and to really influence their thought, which is one of the things that scares me about the podcast era. But we're getting. That's a whole weeds, the whole separate conversation. He would be, like, an Alex Jones type, but, like, with his own show. Yeah. But like, yeah, he would. He would be a lot more popular than Alex. Yeah, he would. Because I don't think Alex has a problem saying the quiet parts loud. And Hitler was, up until the point where he took power, usually pretty good about quietly saying the loud parts. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, that's why he won. Yeah. So most of our evidence for young Hitler's early love affairs comes from a dude named August Kubizek. Now, Kubizek is a heavily debated figure amongst Hitler scholars. He wrote a book about his childhood with Hitler after the war. It apparently started during the Third Reich as a pro Hitler like Nazi biography. And then after the war he was like, well, I mean, I've already got this stuff down. People are going to want to know what Hitler was like as a kid. So I'm going to write this book. Some of what he says is definitely either a lie or stretching the truth. There's a lot of debate over how much to trust him, but it's also incontrovertible that he grew up with Hitler, that he was Hitler's really only friend. The kid and that they live together. They were essentially like freshmen college roommates in the big city, like, so he no one else has this perspective. So Kubizek's book is an irreplaceable source for the early years of Hitler's life. You can't under like, you have to. You have to be critically read him. You have to read him. I've read Cubex book, of course, and it's really interesting. If you do take it, I would recommend reading like a John Toland or an Ian Kershaw biography 1st, and then go into Kubizek. So you've got some sort of context for it, I'm going to be quoting. All three of these sources in the next little bit here because it provides any good synthesis, and I trust those guys to separate probable truth from probable lie better than I trust myself because they're elderly Hitler scholars and I'm just a Hitler nerd. Anyway, Kubizek recalls exactly 1 romantic focus for Hitler and his young years, a girl named Stephanie who lived in Linz. That was the small town that he grew up in. Now, Hitler was madly in love with Stephanie, and we have no evidence that she ever knew anything about him. In fact, later in life, after the war when she was told that Adolf Hitler had been in love with her. She was shocked and horrified, which is it's * **** **** to tell me. What? That. Yeah. Oh, man. What a bummer. Because you're just, like, am I responsible for you? Like, you get through this horrible war. She was in Austria. She saw some ****. It would have been a nightmare for anyone living in that region. You get through this horrible war and then, like, years later, someone, like, by the way Hitler wanted to **** you. What? Why would you ever tell anybody that you process that baby Hitler popping ****** to you? Like, don't don't tell her that. Yeah, because then that just makes you just rethink. Everything about this my fault. Oh, Stephanie, you didn't you didn't do anything wrong. I mean, you've been dead for decades, but you seem fine. You're listening. Somewhere we get a medium should be doing this podcast with a medium to contact some of these people and be like, hey. It's OK. Yeah. Yeah, it's going to be fine. Yeah, that's actually similar to another podcast idea I have, which is using a medium to sexually harass dead ********. I really just want to, like, see how uncomfortable I can make. Chairman Mao. Yeah. Yeah, like, really, really get in there and, like, lock has ghost in a room. Yeah. Yeah. See where it goes. I I am 100% on board for that. I think we all are. So if you want to. So Hitler was in love with this girl who knew nothing about him. He became convinced. And these this while they're in like elementary school, essentially like early high school era, that kind of thing. Like he's a teenager, young teenager. So during this. Oh yeah, I was in marching band. I had one of these kids know exactly what this is. I don't know if there's a woman I've met who didn't have one of these kids in their life. That's one of the yeah. Anyway, so Hitler became convinced that Stephanie was sending him secret signals and messages only he could see. He would, yeah. Yeah, they were destined to be together. He would rant about all this to Kubizek and Kubizek claims he was pretty like questioning of all this stuff to Hitler. But like, only to an extent. Kubizek did try to convince Hitler that if he needed to at least talk to this girl, if there's going to be any hope of her liking him. Released he suggested that Hitler should learn to dance because he knew that Stephanie liked dancing, which is like solid advice. Like, OK, get get interested in something this girl is interested in. Have a similar interest. Pretty solid advice today. So here's Kubasek quote all this is no good Adolf, I replied. Stephanie is fond of dancing. If you want to conquer her, you will have to dance around just as aimlessly and idiotically as the others. That was all that was needed to set him off. Raving. No, no, never. He screamed at me. I shall never dance, do you understand? Stephanie only dances because she is forced to by. Society on which she unfortunately depends. Once she is my wife, she won't have the slightest desire to dance. That is, and Cuba's ex books are generally pretty pro Hitler book. Like, not pro. The stuff Hitler did is like, he's obviously against the Third Reich, but like, he presents a sympathetic view of Hitler and this is how he describes it. Wow, what a I mean, what a little maniac thesaurus for the word loser. It's truly insane. Like, no, I'll never dance. She'll stop dancing. She'll stop dancing too. Dancing. She wants to do it. It sounds like a Reddit. Ghost? No it totally sunny. Sounds like a Reddit post. He'd be top God. Reddit he would be. He'd love Reddit. He would be so addicted to slash poll like he would. He would. He would never get off of that ******* ****. He'd be an 8 Chan, like he'd be deep into this ****. I'm kind of glad. I'm gonna learn to dance. Never. I shall never dance. Adolf Hitler. Yeah, exactly. There's your ******* T-shirt. Guilty feet ain't got no rhythm. Oh, ****. Yeah, nice. Ohh boy. What are the good songs? They they always they always get it right. So I was actually about Hitler. It is about all music is about Hitler one way or the other. That's my theory. We'll talk about totos Africa. It's it's it's a stretch, but I'll get you there now. I got a diagram. I got a diagram. It's it's about the desert fox and. Now, obviously waiting around and being an insane person did not woo Stephanie. Gradually, Hitler started to realize that she wasn't going to fall to him. According to Kubizek, Hitler reacted like you'd expect a modern day in cell to react with threats of violence. Of course, Stephanie was at that time in an unfriendly mood. She would pass the basically nearby Rd with her face averted, as though Hitler did not exist at all. This bought brought him to the verge of despair. I can't stand it any longer, he exclaimed. I will make an end of it. It was the 1st and as far as I know, the last time that Adolf contemplated. Suicide? Seriously, it was not. He would jump into the river from the Danube Bridge, he told me, and then it would be over and done with. But Stephanie would have to die with him. He insisted on that once more. A plan was thought up in all its details. Every single phase of the horrifying tragedy was minutely described, including the part I would have to play. Even my conduct of this as the sole survivor was ordained. The somber scene was with me, even in my dreams. Young Hitler. Oh God, just the most emo little ****. Kill himself and a girl who doesn't know him. God. Like, had he even talked to her at this point? As far as we know. Then he never said a word to her. Oh my God. I I just you can't hate him more. But you you you find new depths. You find new depths of. Yeah, like, yeah, Hitler. Oh, here's a new cavity of hate I haven't filled for. You didn't expect this. ******* loser, you ******* loser. So you know that he's a loser. And then let's just, like, from this age, too, you're like, oh, God, just go to a Toastmasters class or something you ***** ** ****. This is part of why I get all frustrated when people are like, he was a sexual serial killer and that's why. No, dude, he was just a lame. Yes, dude. He's for sure like an incel MRA. Yeah. Yeah. Bad. Yeah. I am old. I am old, this woman. And she doesn't deserve to live if she doesn't like me, even though I've never even talked to her. Like, they were his parents together. His entire dad died when he was, you know, in his teens, and his mom died. Not all that. I mean, his dad died when he was pretty young, and his mom died also when he was pretty young, like young adult. So he his. I don't think he had. His dad was pretty authority authoritarian. But once his dad kicked off, it was kind of just his mom. And she was sort of, he was a mom. This boy, she was sort of a doting mom. Was that Clara? Yeah. Clara Hitler. Clara Hitler. Yeah. Yeah. Hitler. Adolf Hitler's mom was Clara. OK, I see. Gotcha. Yeah. So it's he's born in incest, and then his dad dies, and then he's raised way. OK. Gotcha. Yeah. So. Side of his obsession with Stephanie Kubizek says he doesn't know of any individual women in Hitler's life in this. Certainly no one he might have ******. When they became young adults and moved to Vienna together, Hitler remained unlaid. Here's John Toland's coverage of Cuba's ex recollection quote. On promenades, girls and women would often slightly glance at them. At first Kubizek thought their interest was directed to him, but it soon became apparent that the reserved Adolf was the object. He coldly ignored their silent invitations. If the two did nothing about sex, they spent hours at night discussing women, love and marriage, with Adolf as usual, dominating the conversation over and over. He insisted that he must keep the flame of life pure. That is, he believed in accordance with his Catholic upbringing. A man and a woman should keep themselves chased in body and soul until marriage, and just thus be worthy of producing. Healthy children for the nation. But the dark side of sex also haunted him, and he talked by the hour about depraved sexual customs. He railed against prostitution, condemning not only the ****** in their customers, but society. His condemnation approached obsession, and one night, after attending a performance of Wettin Spring Awakening, he took Gusto's arm and said we must see the sink of iniquity. Once they turned down a small, dark alley. It was the Spittlebug Gusa, and walked past a row of small hostels so brightly lit that they could see the girls inside in their scanty and slovenly attire. They sat there, recalled Kubizek, making up their faces and combing their hair and looking at themselves in the mirror. Without, however, for one moment losing sight of the men's strolling by. Occasionally a man would stop in front of a house, converse with a girl and the light would go out. When the two youths reached the end of the alley, Adolf maneuvered them in an about face and they took another long look at the appalling sight. Back in their room, Adolf went into a lengthy tirade on the evils of prostitution with quote, a cold objectivity, as though it were a question of his attitude towards the fight against tuberculosis or towards cremation. Wow. So this is young Hitler, celibate, angry about other people not being celibate, and a real thought audit level hatred of sex workers he is. Gallons of *** in his sleep at this point in his life. I mean every ******* night. What a what a ****** little his socks shatter when they're dropped. Seriously, I cannot imagine, like how many ******* wet dreams was. Dude is happening constantly. It's and they're all about the stuff that he says is terrible because that's why you rant about this for hours to your best friend, like concealing an erection as a yells about prostitution, prostitutes, or just out there trying to. Make a living of any kind in this world again. We all knew what Hitler like. We we've all known this kid. Oh, God, no. Absolutely. Ohh God. Yeah. Yeah. The one that he's like, that's like one of the names that you text. The other people you went to high school with that you just laugh about when you hear their name. Like, remember that guy? Oh, **** yeah, that guy. Yeah. Yeah. So Hitler's mom died, like right before this point of like a really, really horrifying cancer. And then, you know, he he wound up in Vienna with with. Zach, which is where that happened. They lived together for a while, but Kubizek was successful, like he was a really good musician and Hitler, you know, didn't get in the art school. That's a pretty famous story. He eventually ran out of money and wound up living in a men's home, which was essentially like a homeless shelter for vagrants. According to Ian Kershaw, being homeless did not improve Hitler's game. Yeah, I can't imagine that it would, quote, to be fair, a home wouldn't have been have improved his game. It seems like he was kind of hopeless either way. Yeah, quote when his circle of acquaintances got round to discussing women, and doubtless their own former girlfriends and sexual experiences, the best Hitler could come up with was a veiled reference to Stephanie, who had been his first love, though she never knew it because he never told her. The impression left with Reinhold Hanisch was that Hitler had very little respect for the female sex, but very austere ideas about relations between men and women. Hanisch recalled Hitler telling him of a brief encounter with a milk maid while he was still at school, ending abruptly when she made advances and he ran away, knocking over a churn of milk. In his haste. This was probably a lie. By Hitler, Hitler described his own ideal woman as cuddle is a cute, cuddly, naive little thing. Tender, sweet and stupid. Cool, cool. That's great. You there, baby? Well, I mean, yeah, it runs in his blood. Does run in his blood. Yeah. God, it's going to be weird how much it runs in his blood. But first. Mint Mobile offers premium wireless starting at just 15 bucks a month. And now for the plot twist. Nope, there isn't one. Mint Mobile just has premium wireless from 15 bucks a month. There's no trapping you into a two year contract. You're opening the bill to find all these nuts fees. There's no luring you in with free subscriptions or streaming services that you'll forget to cancel and then be charged full price for none of that. For anyone who hates their phone Bill, Mint Mobile offers premium wireless for just $15.00 a month. Mint Mobile will give you the best rate whether you're buying one or for a family. And it meant. Family start at 2 lines. All plans come with unlimited talk and text, plus high speed data delivered on the nation's largest 5G network. You can use your own phone with any mint mobile plan and keep your same phone number along with all your existing contacts. Just switch to Mint mobile and get premium wireless service starting at 15 bucks a month. Get premium wireless service from just $15.00 a month and no one expected plot twists at That's Seriously, you'll make your wallet very happy at Mint Mobile. Com slash behind now a word from our sponsor better help. If you're having trouble stuck in your own head, focusing on problems dealing with depression, or just you know can't seem to get yourself out of a rut, you may want to try therapy, and better help makes it very easy to get therapy that works with your lifestyle and your schedule. A therapist can help you become a better problem solver, which can make it easier to accomplish your goals, no matter how big or small they happen to be. So if you're thinking of giving therapy a try, better help is a great. Option it's convenient, accessible, affordable, and it is entirely online. You can get matched with a therapist after filling out a brief survey, and if the therapist that you get matched with doesn't wind up working out, you can switch therapists at any time. When you want to be a better problem solver, therapy can get you there. Visit behind today to get 10% off your first month. That's better Hey, Robert Evans here. It's been like two months since I got LASIK laser eye surgery and my vision is still 2020. So many things about my daily life has changed. I don't have to worry about putting on a mask and my glasses fogging up and have to take out contacts at night or put them in the day. I don't have to, like, worry all the time when I'm traveling. Like, how many contacts do I have by go swimming at the lake during the summer? Something I like to do, go to the beach or whatever. I don't have to worry about losing a contact or, you know, bringing swimming glasses or something. With me, everything is just easier. And getting it done was easy too. You know, I went in, I had my consultation, they told me I was a good candidate and then I went back in couple of days later about it being about a boom. You know, my eyes were perfect. So LASIK Plus is a leader in laser vision correction in the United States. They have over 20 years in the industry and more than two million treatments performed. If you want to start your LASIK plus journey, you can get $1000 off when treated in September. That's 500 per eye. So to schedule your free. Consultation now. We're back. OK, so Hitler also claimed during this. That women would inherently quote, rather bow to a strong man than dominate a weakling. Even for the time, young Hitler was seen as a bit of a prude. This meant he didn't fit in super well in turn of the century Vienna, where ****** art was in vogue and people were starting to do the 1909 version of opening up a little bit. Well, because he's just like popping ****** all over the popping. Everyone could see him, his leader Hosen, just like. ******* arrow. Yeah. It's just like, constantly. Just like very sweaty and pink with like a giant boulder, angry, erect, terrible artist screaming at everybody and talking about how it's bad to come. Like, constantly being Hitler. Like, oh God, you nerd. So one of the things that was happening in Vienna at this time, the turn of the century, is that rules about women's modesty had started to change, and women were allowed to. I mean, we're not talking like woke by our standards, but things are improving, you know, things are improving. And some women are pushing the envelope both professionally and in just how they present themselves to the world. Young Hitler did not like that. Here's an excerpt from Kershaw's Book, Again, quote, where Decency demanded that women were scarcely allowed to even show an ankle. Hitler's embarrassment and the rapidity with which he fled with his friend when a prospective landlady, during a search for a room for Kubizek, let her silk dressing gown fall open to reveal that she was wearing nothing but a pair of knickers. But his prudishness went far beyond this. It amounted, according to Cubex account, to a deep disgust and repugnance at sexual activity. Hitler avoided contact with women's meeting with cold indifference during visits to the opera, alleged attempts by young women, probably seeing him as something of an oddity to flirt with or tease him. He was repelled by homosexuality. He refrained from ************ prostitution horrified. Fascinated him. He associated it with venereal disease, which petrified him. So. It is again hard to say how much of Cuba's ex account is true. If Hitler was originally super anti-gay, for example, he definitely got over that **** by the time he was out of the army. Ernst Rohm, the head of the Brown shirts, was a flamboyantly gay man who was flagrant about his love life. Hitler did eventually kill Rome, but only after he was in power, and some accounts say he resisted doing so for a very long time and expressed angst over the decision. Basically, Rome wanted to replace the German army with the brown shirts, and that's why Hitler had to get rid of him. And there was definitely like he was willing to kill him because he was gay and he was seen as like a liability. Hitler wasn't inherently against the idea of working like you see. It seems like he moderated on that as during his time in the army, at least from like a one point of view or another. There's debate about how much, but one thing that didn't change from Cuba's ex memory of him was Hitler's obsession with venereal disease. The subject came up frequently and mine Kampf, and in Hitler's early speeches he generally like would compare the Jewish refugees immigrating to the country as like a form of venereal disease. And there there was a lot of anti-Semitic claims that Jewish. Institutes were spreading typhus, and there's actually a rumor that Hitler himself got syphilis from a prostitute sometime in like, when he was a young adult. Simon Wiesenthal, the famed Nazi hunter, went to his grave believing this, even though there's no good evidence about it. There's a lot of weird questions as to why people is someone, like, resentful who is a Holocaust survivor himself? Would be so much like into wanting to believe this. I mean, I get that though. Yeah, you kind of want to like a reason Andy had syphilis. Like, it's also there's like some weird a lot of the attempts to. Explain Hitler kind of come across as blaming a single Jewish person for his hatred of Jewish people, which is really problematic. Yeah, that's an issue. Yeah, yeah. Kubizek, for his part, always claimed that Hitler was, to the best of his knowledge, a normal dude. Sexually not homosexual, not into anything weird. Just like kind of a sexually frustrated young man. Kubizek was so emphatic about that because by the 1950s when he was working on his book, there were numerous rumors that Hitler had been gay. This conspiracy theory is best embodied by the book The Pink Swastika from 1995. That book was a major source for a recent Danish Desouza documentary where Danish claims that Democrats are the modern Nazis and that gay people are Nazis and Hitler was ***. ** * regular headline and far right publications, I found one on Breitbart from 2016 that just said new evidence from his doctor shows Hitler was gay. Obviously, it's not new. But it's just it's it's the old OSS reports that suggested Hitler was homosexual. In the OS document, Doctor ****** wrote, quote, his sex life is as duelist, as political outlook. He is both a homosexual and heterosexual, both socialist and fervent nationalist, both man and woman. Again, that's just like psychoanalytic ********. There's there's no evidence that he was homosexual. He was OK with working with gay men. But like, there was no evidence beyond that. And it's like, yeah, one of things that's interesting to me is when you read a lot of like the old 1930s and late 20s news articles criticizing Hitler, a lot of these like 1920s German. Journalists, some of whom are conservative when they're talking about like, homosexuality with the Nazi party, go out of their way to not condemn homosexuality, to just be like that. We're condemning the Nazis because their attitudes on homosexuality are so negative. But they have all these gay members, which is more nuanced than I expected out of like 1920s journalists in Germany. Yeah. It does make a lot of sense though, because it's like, I mean, coming after World War One, you're in the trenches with men and you need some kind of comfort to probably a lot of. It's ******* in World War One. Sure, yeah. Yeah. Just to to feel like you're a person and not just part of a meat grinder. Yeah, you know, so it's like, I'm sure that definitely, you know, part of why attitudes started to open up right until the Nazis claimed them shut again. Yeah, exactly. Now, just so we covered the basics of Hitler's life here. Hitler served in World War One, obviously. He was at the front basically the entire war. There are rumors, as we covered in our children of dictators episode, that he fathered a son with a French woman during this time. This is very much doubted by historians. The kind of thing you can't 100% debunk, but for what it's worth, the son of the guy who thought he was Hitler's son says that Hitler was a gentle lover to his grandma. I don't know that's based on. Seems like a reach. Seems like a weird flex, too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Here's the thing. I don't even know. I feel like he would be just like a petrified guy that would, like, come really quickly. I'm going to guess that is more accurate. Yeah. That feels way like, yeah, he's probably all ******* talk. And then he's just like, OK, yeah, no, I'm sorry. When he comes and that's that's the Hitler. Now, when Hitler got back from World War One, he was sent by his military superiors to infiltrate a meeting of the National Socialist Political Party. And yeah, you know, the the rest, more or less. He started giving speeches there, became a figure in the National Socialist Party consolidated power and plotted his, you know, not quite meteoric, but eventually total rise to power. Now, we don't have a whole lot on Hitler's sexuality during the early 1920s or his relationships. Honch Stangel is one of the main sources for the claims that Hitler might have been gay. And he said stuff like this quote. Obvious prostitutes barely admitted to the Kaiserhof hotel were fervently admired by him, provided that they appeared in couples or with a man. A solitary woman is usually ignored by him unless he is in a large crowd and can send in someone to find out her identity. He always wishes to be a spectator, do you know? He once said to Doctor Sedgwick in 1923. The audience at the circus is just like a woman, someone who does not understand that intrinsically feminine character of the mass will never be an effective speaker. Ask yourself, what does a woman? Spectrum, a man, clearness, decision, power, action. Like a woman the masses fluctuate between extremes. What we want is to get the masses to act. This can obviously not be done with an appeal to their selfishness, nor do their cowardice, but by an appeal to their idealism, their courage and their spirit of sacrifice. Who has more the spirit of sacrifice than a woman? If she has talked to properly, she will be proud to sacrifice, because no woman will ever feel that her life sacrifices have received their dual fulfillment. That's Hitler analyzing the German people and interesting. Yeah, you know, just what a first date, what a first date. Hanfstaengl claims to have asked him once, why don't you marry? And he says Hitler answered, quote, marriage is not for me and never will be. My only bride is my motherland. Then, seemingly with no sequence of ideas, he added. There are two ways in which a man's character may be judged by the woman he marries and by the way, he dies in 1923 when Hodge Stangle once playfully said, if not a bride, you ought to have a mistress. Lily replied. Politics is a woman. He who loves her unhappily bites off his head. So this is one of the versions of Hitler. You get that? He's just too busy being the embodiment of Germany to to flirt with ladies. ***** ** ****. I think in this day he continues that line the rest of his life. I think in this stage it's not true, but he's not actually dating around that much, and in this stage he's still too awkward. He starts to have success with women when he gets popular, yeah, when we start getting some power, because then it's not about him, it's about the the mythic thing that he's created. And in that case, he keeps saying that out loud and hiding his relationships with women, but he's also ******* some people. So anyway, that's the that's the way this goes. So it's hard, basically impossible to say when Hitler lost his virginity. We do have one spectacular example of Hitler striking out with a lady. It happened in 1923, right before Hitler's famous Beer Hall putsch, when they were at Burkes, Garden. Now the stories related by Hanfstaengl, who could come to visit Hitler and Bertis Garden on invitation, but like Hitler didn't, like, own a house there or anything at that point that we're all staying in a hotel. The manager of the hotel was a guy named Hair Buckner, who was a German flying ace in World War One and who had according to Hanfstaengl. They quote strikingly buxom, 6 foot tall blonde wife which made her taller than Hitler. This rather vulgar, sensuous blue eyed woman had manifestly succeeded in completely inflaming Hitler to a degree that made him seem entirely beyond himself. His breath was short, his cheeks feverish, his eyes filled with exaltation. In a swashbuckling manner, Hitler was strutting up and down the large veranda and garden, swinging his whip. He would stop now and again to talk to fraud, Buckner whip and hand punctuating his sentences with the whip. In a schoolboy fashion, he was obviously showing off. Talking at fraud Buckner in the numerous gallery of admiring females, all party adherents, he made, however, no impression on fraud Buckner on and on he went through the whole afternoon, acting the Desperado, the Wildman, the Man of Destiny. The whole performance seemed hopefully pubescent and empty. Hilarious. Just whacking a whipple. Just swinging a whip. Trying to flirt with a girl? Check out my whip. Check this **** out. Look at how good I am with this whip. Are you impressed? You think I look good? That's like the 1920s version of just, like watching somebody play video games. Check it out. Check it out. Good I am. Somebody get this headshot. So many potions. Think of how many potions I have. It's not real. They also had a gigantic crush on his friend puts his wife Helena Hochdahl Ian Kershaw writes quote on one occasion he took advantage of Putsy Hodge Stangel's brief absence from the room to fall on his knees in front of Helena honcho dangle, describing himself as her slave and bemoaning the fate that had led him to her. Too late. When Helena told him of the incident, Putsy put it down to Hitler's need to play the role of the languishing troubadour from time to time. This guy just like needed to be like he's a cook, is what he actually is like. That, I think, is what he would have preferred. He needed a good sex therapist. You say no, dude, just do this. Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. Just, like, ask, like, watch some of your friends bone. That's what I think you'd. That's why I think you'd be happiest with Hitler. Maybe give up politics and just watch your friends bone. Yeah, be that guy. Be that guy. Yeah, compared to Hitler, that's a great guy to be. Yeah. Well, and especially, like, that is the child of a dead uncle, you know? I mean, like, that's what your kid becomes. Yeah. So when Putsy later expressed the worry that Hitler was essentially trying to steal his wife's affections, Helena told Putsy not to worry. Hitler was, quote, an absolute neuter, so that was Helena's attitude towards him now. Hitler would later prove them and the OSS wrong. Actually, in the early autumn of 1926, when the rising fascist political star met a girl named Mimi writer, we will talk about her, Hitler's courtship process and his preferences and ******* in Part 2 of this podcast, but right now. It's the end of the episode until Thursday when we talk about the rest of this stuff. I see. Yeah, that was just. That's just getting us to this. Tamimi, that's just getting us to Mimi. Mimi, maybe the 1st girl, he thought it's really. Well, no, not the first girl he ***** but like the first girl. We have a lot of detail on how he courted her. I see. So we're going to be talking a lot about how Hitler flirted with girls was finally moving on from his ******* hand. His ******* hand. His leader. Hosen. Exactly. God, he's such a. He's such a loser. He's such a loser. I just wish. Igbinoghene loser there needs to be like, what is the? People need to know how lame we we always do. Like, it's either like Hitler at the end of the war where he's like a sick old man or, like, Hitler is this terrifying warlord. Yeah. And we miss out on incel Hitler. You definitely nailed the Elliot Rodger's perspective for sure, like, and he it's so interesting, too, because it seems like he skipped right to in cell. Like he didn't have this, like, game phase where he was even trying to make it work. He just immediately knew that he needed power of any kind to get anybody because he was such a 0. Because, yeah, there was otherwise no chance. Yeah, well, the entitlement, all of yeah, it's it's gross. You know, I try not to like, psychoanalyze how much of this was, like, did he get into power because he was like, I think it was probably ancillary and everyone does things for a lot of reasons. But like you can't look at his back story and not see that like, frustrated kid who just like, yeah, doesn't understand why some people are good at that and he's not. And like, he's ****** because of it. Well, and it's just like the entitlement as opposed to like growing yourself. Making yourself a more rounded performing the dance, yes, exactly. I mean that. That's exactly. It's all these kind of guys. It's just like, just get a hobby that isn't just like trying to **** somebody. It's like, no, just be a well-rounded person in your own regard and then people will be interesting for people to be interested in you because his whole thing and like in cubex book, it becomes like the way he portrays Hitler is like he loves talking about his opinions on everything, of course, but he's not good at much, no. He just loves to talk about what he thinks about things. Of course. And, like, learn to dance, man. That kind of self important with nothing to back it up. It's just we don't care. Learn to dance. Yeah, like life is not that serious. Just, like, learn to dance a little bit. Go do something besides yell at people. Hitler. Yeah. Get a ******* dog. Yeah, get a ******* dog. Well, he did do that. And we will talk about how dogs play into his flirtation style soon. Of course they do. It's going to be gross. Brandy? You got some plugs to plug? Yeah. You can find me on Twitter. On Instagram at Brand Dazzle Bra Andaz LED I have a podcast called Lady to Lady that's very fun. Every Wednesday, me, Barbara Gray, Tess Barker, with a 4th guest every week. And then if you were in Los Angeles, I have a monthly show every second Saturday called Picture this. That is at the Virgil. It's a $10 show. It's a comedians paired with animators, and they live animate your jokes during your set. It's very, very fun. We just had a Pendleton ward, the creator of central time, on the last last one, Craig. Heartland does our show a lot. He's the creator of hey Arnold, and we have people from, like, Bojack and thick mouth and like all sorts of awesome cartoon shows. It's super simple, man. It's crazy. Yeah, that's awesome. Yeah, it's really fun. It's second Saturday of every month. It's my favorite thing to do. And then I tore like half the year. So And yeah, that sounds so much more gratifying than just talking about Hitler sex life. It is, but if you're into Hitler sex life, you should follow my Twitter. Yeah, I'm at, I write. OK, you should follow. This shows Twitter at ******* pod. You find the sources for this episode and every episode on Look us up on T public behind the ******** T public by shirt. Wear it. Fight Hitler even though he's dead and you're not actually fighting him. Just buy a shirt and feel better capitalism. You find us on Twitter and on Instagram. And faster. It's pod. Sophie isn't here and this is a *** ****. Train wreck. Play me out, Johnny. Hello, I'm Erica Kelly from the podcast Southern Fried True crime and if you want to go from podcast fan to podcast host, do what I did and check out spreaker from iheart. I was working in accounting and hating it. Then after just 18 months of podcasting with Speaker, I was able to quit my day job. Follow your podcasting dreams. Let's break your handle the hosting, creation, distribution, and monetization of your podcast. Go to That's SPREAK. 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