Behind the Bastards

There’s a reason the History Channel has produced hundreds of documentaries about Hitler but only a few about Dwight D. Eisenhower. Bad guys (and gals) are eternally fascinating. Behind the Bastards dives in past the Cliffs Notes of the worst humans in history and exposes the bizarre realities of their lives. Listeners will learn about the young adult novels that helped Hitler form his monstrous ideology, the founder of Blackwater’s insane quest to build his own Air Force, the bizarre lives of the sons and daughters of dictators and Saddam Hussein’s side career as a trashy romance novelist.

A Very Special Election Reading of Ben Shapiro's Unreadable Book

A Very Special Election Reading of Ben Shapiro's Unreadable Book

Tue, 03 Nov 2020 11:00

A Very Special Election Reading of Ben Shapiro's Unreadable Book

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Hey, Robert here. It's been like two months since I had LASIK and I'm still seeing 2020. All I had to do was go in for a consultation, then go in for a maybe 10 minute procedure and then my eyes have been great ever since. You know, I healed up wonderfully. It was very simple, couldn't have been a better experience. So if you want to explore LASIK plus I can't recommend it enough. They have over 20 years experience in the industry and they performed more than two million treatments right now if you want to try getting LASIK plus you can get $1000 off of your surgery when you're treated in September, that's $500. Of per eye, just visitmylasikoffer.com to schedule your free consultation. Hello, I'm Erica Kelly from the podcast Southern Fried true crime. And if you want to go from podcast fan to podcast host, do what I did and check out spreaker from iheart. I was working in accounting and hating it. Then after just 18 months of podcasting with Spreaker, I was able to quit my day job. Follow your podcasting dreams. Let's breaker handle the hosting, creation, distribution, and monetization of your podcast. Go to spreaker.com. That's spreaker.com. Hey there, it's Ebony Monet, your co-host for the San Diego Zoo's Amazing Wildlife podcast. In this special episode, we're speaking with Doctor Jane Goodall about the fascinating journey that led to her social discoveries on chimpanzees SO4-O months, the chimps ran away from me. I mean, they take one look at this peculiar white ape and disappear into the vegetation. Bing wildlife on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. What's distracting us from the election? Yeah, there we go. Welcome America to behind the ******** the podcast about terrible people. Normally, this week is not gonna be anybody's favorite week ever. Probably. It might be. It's possible, but unlikely because of the election, which it is right now. So we're we're going to try and ease a little bit of that stress and pain by reading another few chapters from Benetton Shapiro's terrible, terrible book true allegiance. Our favorite book our our Bible. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Cody and I would, I would describe as, I don't know, I I was gonna make a joke, but then I realized I don't know enough about religion to make a good religion joke. So I don't have a joke. It's just good. It's a good book. Yeah. We go to it for wisdom. Like when I wake up and I don't know what I'm gonna do with my day or how to feel, I flip through it and it inspires me. If I am trying to sleep late at night and I I'm like stressed out, I read a few pages and yeah, I get relaxed. I get, you know, some little few Nuggets. Star football players have no name. Exactly. And then and then then I feel at peace. I feel it at one, you know, and and then I do it all again the next day. Hmm. Yeah. So we're gonna be dropping this on Election Day so you can listen to it while you're standing in line and or getting into gunfights with fascist paramilitaries. Whatever winds up being our reality. Yeah, whichever you want. Sure. Yeah. So that's that's good. That's great. We're all very happy, Cody. We should also the elephant in the room, Katie is not here. Her dog is sick, unfortunately. So our thoughts are with both her and her dog in equal measure as she is at the dog hospital. Yes. Heart goes out to Katie and Benny. We love you, Benny and Katie. The good Benny. The good Benny. Yeah. As opposed to the author of this book, Ben Shapiro. Yeah. The bad Benny who wrote the good book, this book. Book The the book book. So when we last left off, we we had that fun chapter with uh with Soledad and her militia who? She seemed to be the plot seemed to be piloting rather than her because as a woman in Bens book, she's not allowed to actually make decisions, you know, why would she? Yeah, why would she? Would she? It's not a it's not a fantasy novel. Robert, come on. So our next chapter we're back in Detroit MI for leva with Levon. Or at least we'll be with him for a few paragraphs until. Just doing another character. Ohh gosh, how many tenses do you think will get in this chapter? Levon couldn't believe what he was hearing. Reverend Jim Crawford sat there in the conference room of The MGM Grand. The room had already been scanned for bugs and been found clean. And his expense? Wow, that is a sentence right now. Oh my God. Reverend Jim Crawford sat there, in the conference room of The MGM Grand. And then there's an—The room had already been scanned for bugs and been found clean. Second—in his expensive suit, explaining why he thought he should get his people off the street. One sentence. There's so many clauses. That's. Oh my God. Yeah, bin. Use the *******. Or, like, you don't even like, oh, OK, it's OK to have sentences or writer insensibly senses can be short all you need, you know, you need the subject. You know, you need a little verb, maybe like an object in there. Yeah, but like, even that first one where you were saying he was, what was it? He's sitting there, in the conference room. No, he was just sitting there in the conference room. Get rid of that. Mama. Yeah, but you're about to have a long—clause that is itself an entire sentence. Oh, and here's the best part. After in his expensive suit, explaining why he thought Leon should get his people off the street, the next sentence is just the word now. Oh my God. Oh, split the difference. Ben. Oh my God. Oh, so many extremes. What? Like, you couldn't write worse if you tried. It's it's really something else. Like, presumably an editor looked at this. I don't, but I have to. Like, I don't know, I think he's like Glenn Greenwald. He does not like to be edited. Yeah, they are like, I'm sure they offered to edit it, but then I was like, no, you're censoring me and quit. You don't edit poetry. I'll publish this myself because I'm an artist. Allegedly. Hmm. OK. Leave on. Had seen Big Jim's press conference with the mayor the previous week. That's a sentence. The mayor, still sporting a bandage over his gashed forehead, had thanked Big Jim profusely for stopping the violence, for cutting short the possibility of a riot. OK, OK, OK, alright, let's wait a little uneven. That's like my OneNote like, sometimes you nail it in that you write a sentence, and other times it seems like maybe you need to add word. See, this is the other thing that I read his book for. It. It gets out the toxins he made me spit out. Coffee. *** **** it. It's that good. That was fun to watch. Yeah. Sorry. That'll be good for everybody on the end, listening to this in line to vote or getting into a gunfight with fascist paramilitaries again. Either way, it could be both. It could be both. Yeah. Yeah. Multitask. You know, there's a lot going on in 2020, so, yeah, they talk about problems of inequality. Problems of racial justice. They're talking to the mayor. They're doing a a conversation with the mayor about racial justice. After this big riot, mayor Burns nodded along, knowing that he had no choice. Dash, he could use the photo up with the civil rights icon in his reelection campaign. Newsweek put big Jim on its cover. The headline, the Peacemaker. The photo framed his head with a Halo. In the piece, Big Gem in Detroit said that Detroit would have to pursue a complete makeover of its obviously racist. Police Department. That meant community policing in the truest sense, drawing police officers from the community itself. That didn't mean hiring officers from the outside, the way they'd hired Ricky O'Sullivan. It didn't even mean hiring black cops from outside the city and forced him to live in the city, to get to know the people they protected. And meant hiring longtime residents of the city, even people with backgrounds. America says, said Big Jim. Yeah, exactly. It's like, this is a horrible idea, like what bins actually saying here. Like he's trying to frame this as like, this evil black terrorist has a plan to make. If the cops be gangsters by community policing. But what he's actually saying is community policing, like having neighborhoods policed by people who live in those neighborhoods is a bad idea because blacks are criminals. Like that's what being is actually saying. Oh my God, people with there's like the phrase people with backgrounds like, say what you mean, buddy? What are their backgrounds? But like, it's as you were reading that I was like, surely, surely this is actually going to be framed as though it's a bad thing and he did not disappoint. No, no, no, no, it absolutely did not. He wants, like, to force people from out of the city to, like, move there to police the area they work and what all of the stuff like. There's actually a lot of problems with community policing as it's generally introduced. But but all of the stuff? Big Jim, who is, again, the devil? Basically, the bid is saying here is perfectly reasonable. You want to know why our community doesn't trust the police. They don't trust the police because to them, the police are strangers and the other way around. And it takes more than a few than living in the community a few months to earn trust. I'll tell you what he told the Newsweek reporter. It takes more than even being a good policeman. It means having been through with these folks have been through. It means knowing that just because somebody got sent up to prison for some stupid drug crime that wouldn't have gotten a white boy six months in the can, that doesn't mean their life should be over. It means understanding that there's a legacy of racism against these people. They're engaged in a plot to overthrow the government. It I it is. It is so frustrating hearing this young man, right? This book, like, yeah. Because it just it makes it clear that he knows, yeah, like he's making he's he knows and he's making the argument like, that is correct and good. So he know. He knows. He knows what the argument is, but whenever he talks about it, he pretends like he doesn't. I shouldn't have gotten mad at my favorite book. Sorry, Ben. Take it back. It's OK. You. Only you. Only. You know, we only hurt the books we love. Which, you know, is why, for example, every night I get into a fist fight with a copy of Slaughterhouse 5. You know, it's just it's just what happens when you're sad. You're drinking. Exactly. You assault the books that you love and you wake up and caress them. Yeah. OK. So yeah, the interview had caused an uproar that even quoted leave on it, Robert, I believe we left off at the— There's so many and dashes in this ******* book, which I get it, right? Like we all use them, especially like when I'm and stuff that's not for publication. I'll throw them in a lot because it's a helpful way for me to like remember how I plan to read it, like my scraps. Solutely. Yeah. Like people ask like, why I don't push them up. It's because like, they're messy as hell. They're not like they're I write them their essays, but they're they're written well written with your cadence and. Exactly. And I would not publish them that way because they wouldn't read well if someone else were reading them, right. Yeah. Been like it is the thing that new writers do. It's fine, like if you're using a lot of EM dashes, but your goal should be, you know, the sentences. It's fine. Like, yeah. Also, he's not a new writer at this point. He's not a new writer. He's been doing it. It's the only thing he's ever done in his entire life. For money. Yeah, exactly. Yes. The only thing he's ever done for a living. Yeah. It's literally his one job. And he's he's and he's killing it. He's nailing it. He's nailing it. Yeah, the interview would cause an uproar. They'd even close quoted Leaf on it, asking him what he thought of Big Jim's leadership. Levon told them that without Big Jim, the whole street would have gone up in flames. Big Jim, he told them, is standing up for us so long as he does. And so long as we get justice, we can make this city whole again. Now. However, Levon regretted he'd ever laid eyes on Big Jim. He'd been foolish to have trusted the man. He'd figured he could always outplay him. Everybody thought big Jim was past his prime, that he'd run his course after a youth of rabble rousing and race baiting, he entered the mainstream. Yada yada. He appeared in liquor stores. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. He's just making the same choice. Banning race baiting. OK, so he he he he's. Yeah. Big Jim's talking to him about how they've done a lot of good and they're OK uh, that they they they've achieved some things and levon's gonna get what he wants and he should he should be satisfied with what they've gotten so far and and played the cards they've got. Yeah. OK. So that's what big Jim saying. OK yeah. This is next paragraph in Afghanistan or like, no, no, no. It was already packed when he pulled up in the shop set us. So he leaves the meeting with Big Jim angry because Big Jim is happy with the. The gains they've made, it was already packed. When he pulled up in the shop set, a slightly overweight black woman, Regina Malone, clutched a handkerchief to her face. Her every makeup was streaked with tears. She looked like she hadn't stopped crying since she found out about her son, Kendrick. And the truth was, she hadn't. Kendrick had been her youngest boy, a good boy, she told the media. Shot to death because of police racism. The president had called her, offer his condolences and told her he'd stop at nothing to get to the bottom of the case. That's what a president would say. I'm going to get to the bottom of the case as the President case. Yeah. Yeah. I also like that his left wing rag. And this is Newsweek, the magazine that Andy. Low rates columns for, but also Ben writes for it. Ben's written for Newsweek. Yeah, the Wayne County prosecutor hadn't been as forthcoming. She'd been elected for a fluke. The entire government in Wayne County sprang from the Democratic Party. But Kim Donohue had lucked into her job. Uh, so she it is a fluke that a competent conservative had become the prosecutor here. Yeah, she'd been appointed with no opposition, yadda, yadda, yadda. So he's just describing this person who is his ideal human being because she's going to not going to prosecute cops for shooting a black boy. Uh-huh. Yeah. OK. That's good. Talking about how great this prosecutor is, OK, Regina Malone, standing next to Big Jim, had called a press conference in which he asked Donahue to recuse herself, given her ties to the Police Department. Donahue had refused, stating that she would ensure justice was served, and implied that if anyone implied her skin color meant that she couldn't be objective, they were racist. The light made national headlines, turning, and turned Kim Donohue into one of those polarizing political figures in America. Levon got out of his car, Regina. What mentioned their skin color? I thought it was because of her relationship with the police. Yeah, I know. I yeah that no, no one did it doesn't seem like OK just making alright. She she's doing the thing that Ben says you shouldn't do, but ** ***** likes cops. So Ben's fine with it because yeah it it does sound like she's the one who brought race into it. Then on the television stood Kim Dominic Donahue, the cheer. So we we go through a little bit of this, like levon's talking with the mother of this dead boy, and then the news announces that the DA's not gonna charge the police officer who shot the kid as as happens repeatedly. Yeah, so that's that's cool. She says that she's not doing the agenda of the mob the evidence that the support manslaughter doesn't support murder. Levon gets angry at this, as you as you might as well. 11 might. One might get angry at that. Yeah, the mayor asks everybody to remain calm, so I think we're gonna have, yeah. And big Jim tells people not to riot. So I think that's that's that's that's what we're gonna have here. Uh, very, very subtle foreshadowing, Ben. Yeah. And also the officers getting released from prison the day that they choose not to do charges, which is not how it works. They like charge them and then they they get ten really get out on on bail, which is like what's happened every time one of these guys shot somebody and actually been charged, but whatever. OK, administrative leave. Paid administrative leave. So leave on is surrounded by cameras and like, media. After this announcement that they're not charging, the cop comes in and he realizes that he's standing next to the mother of the kid who's just been killed, and he has a great opportunity to be a rabble rouser. So the camera zoomed in on Levon. He forced himself to cry, just to tear; He looked up at the throat, at the Browning tiles of the ceiling. He's doing Obama. He's doing Obama. He's doing Obama. Sandy Hook cry. Oh yeah. So is Obama cry? He cried the one tear. The same. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. The right hates that he cried that one tear. Yeah. He's literally doing that. He's doing that. You're probably right. Yeah. OK Yep, definitely. Then he exhaled slowly and looked directly into the camera. Enough dead children. It stops today. Yeah, he didn't. He didn't. Oh my God. It's so bad. Oh my God. Every now and then we'll get to, like, a chunk. Like, we just went through where it's kind of dull. And then you get Ben Shapiro, like, making the terrorist leader do the exact same thing Obama did. When he was sad that 20 something children got shot to death in assault rifle at school. Oh my God. Oh that's so good slash bad at this. It's it's amazing. Like one of the things that's frustrating is like I don't like Obama or Biden but they keep getting attacked by the right for things that like aren't bad. Like I don't think Obama was faking his tears at 20 something children getting shot to death because he's a person, right? Being it makes you sad. It's like it's so it's it. I mean it's. A lot of that stuff just speaks to, like, their worldview and who they are, right? Like, they don't cry or, like, feel those things. Yeah, Ben didn't give a **** about those kids. So why would Obama. Yeah, exactly. Like, oh, he's surely he has to be faking it because nobody would ever cry at this. Yeah, it can't be that. Like, no, he can both, like, have a callous disregard for the lives of people in Yemen and also, like, see a bunch of small children shot to pieces with a rifle and be ****** ** by it because he's a dad. Like, yeah, like, those those really don't conflict with each other. No, as much as maybe they should, but like, yeah, ohh, God. And it's it's the same thing with like, the the paid protesters stuff. Yeah. You think that because you would need to get paid to protest something in order to care about people getting harmed who weren't you, you would need money because you're a bad person. Unbelievable. I cannot believe you just did that. I can't believe it. I mean, I I can't. Hey. OK. And yeah, he's he's. OK, so he just says that to the news and then he's silently leads a crowd that I guess is formed at this point away from the barbershop towards the criminal Justice Center. So he's marching with a big protest that I'm sure is going to burn the city down. Yeah, that's the thing that's going to happen next, so. Now we're back to Brett Hawthorne. Yes, there we go. Ohh yeah. Ohh yeah. Brett. ******* precious. Yeah. Sweet bread. Get that bear of a man in here. Yeah. Britt surveyed the damage from the top of a nearby parking lot. It stretched before him like a diorama. Unreal in miniature. Too dramatic for life. Since the attacks, all commercial air travel had been shut down thanks to warnings from the Department of Homeland Security. The terror chatter had actually elevated after the attack. DHS thought. The airlines. Be targeted again. Given the focus on the destruction of the bridge, Brett's homecoming hadn't been much of 1 by the time he landed. His rescue, if you could call it that, had been blown off the front pages by the terror attack. His flight back to Texas had been cancelled, and he'd been stashed at a local hotel with Oh my God, this sentence. His flight back to Texas had been cancelled, and he'd been stashed at a local hotel, with guards on him at nearly all times—The president was obviously worried he'd talked to the media without handlers nearby. Ohh, those first few comments did not need to be there. You could just have written a couple of sentences there, buddy. It's OK to use the period, but like everyone does. And it's also OK to just like not use commas and just like keep writing. I kind of want. Yeah yeah, you're in the middle of a sentence. Just keep going. You're almost done with the sentence. I kind of want to get. You know, they have those books. I assume they have these books for little girls about like their first periods. I want to like Photoshop. One of those to be Forbin and. Have like, using periods and sentences. It's actually OK. It's OK. It's OK. Everyone misses. It's everyone does it. It's totally natural. Very funny. Well, you know, he's not he's pretty afraid of P words. So, yeah, he is. Ellen had hinted via phone that some big move was imminent in Texas from the governor, but he hadn't had time to focus on that. He'd been more focused on helping out Bill Collier. Collier's wife, Jennifer, had been on the bridge. They still hadn't dredged up her body. The day after his arrival, bill had met Brett at his hotel he dismissed as security. For a few minutes, Brett could see that his friend had aged a century in a day. His face looked craggy, his eyes sunken. Bill had been married to Jennifer for a long time. He had also lost his daughter in the attack. An 8 year old he'd called his little trooper. We don't. We don't get her name. Why? Why it? Why would you give her a name? I do love that. That's like this guy losing his eight-year old daughter is an afterthought. Like, right? Yeah. This young child also died like. By the way, very fun by the way. His small daughter's dead too. Yadda yadda yadda. They they talk about this man who has lost his wife and young child, talks with Brett about the fact that he's afraid the president's going to use the terrorist attack to call for a massive spending package on infrastructure and urge further cuts to the military. Yeah. The worst nightmare is an infrastructure bill. Yeah, what the hell his name. He doesn't know where his his eight-year old corpse is, but he's concerned about an infrastructure bill. Like a human would you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's all that I have on my mind. Yeah, well, you know what I have on my mind? Cody and Robert? Products and services. Perhaps it is the only thing that can bomb the loss of an 8 year old. That's true. That's true. 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I'm like OHL the reasons God just and ignoring like I love yeah in the middle of the action we're going like it's starting but like earlier let's see like how we got here. Let's do all the boring stuff real quick instead of instead of summing up the boring stuff in a sentence. You know Bill had you know through a haze of tears ordered you know uh Brett to to New York in order to do this and this like bam you got it in a sentence. Let's get continue the action we're going back. And rather than, you know, trying to establish any emotional pathos by by lingering on the fact that this man has lost his wife and child, he's just talking at like normal about how they need Brett here and how bad it is that the president wants to build up infrastructure. Uh, it's it's **** your data. We gotta stop the roads. Yeah. Ohh. Wow. Yeah. So Brett says the president won't like that. And Bill says tough. My patience for ******** goes out the window after I watched them search on television for my daughter's body, said the chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff. I'll make whatever excuses I have to make. I want to know who's responsible for this. And right now, you're my best lead. You're the only person. Yeah. So that's been really understands how humans deal with grief. Yeah. No, no, he doesn't. You. Could have just stopped that. Ben doesn't really understand how humans. You could have just stopped humans. Yeah, he he does also understands tense because you would not say like where I saying to you, Cody, that my patience for ******** goes out the window after I watched them search on television for my daughter's body. That's not what I would say. I would say my patience for ******** went out the window when I watched them search on television for my daughter's body. Or my patients goes out the window when I see them doing X or Y. Yes, every way, basically, but the way big. Wrote it. It would be grammatically appropriate. Yeah. OK. So, yeah. Plus, I'll need your word that you'll stay away from the media. That's the only thing Prescott cares about. Amazing. Like that what you care about infrastructure and your daughters bodies. Not even young guy. Like. Come on, dude. OK. Brett nodded. I'm sorry about your family, Bill. Call your grimaced. Yeah, me too. He said me too. No, go get the pieces of **** who did this so I can bomb them back into the 6th century. We've heard. He's just like writing Independence Day. Yeah, like, bad and worse. Yes. The thing that a man would say after being comforted by a friend for the loss of his wife and daughter. Like, I'm sorry about your family. Yeah, me too. Me too. Yeah. Yeah. Hey, you know what? Same. Yeah, same these, bro. It's like they're talking about a car that got totaled, right? Like, that's what's like, oh, hey, man, I'm sorry about your car. I know you really like that car. It's like, yeah, me too. You know, too. It's a bummer. It's a bummer, right? This is your wife and daughter, dude. Yeah, like I said, it's a bummer. It's yeah, it was lame as hell, bro. I thought I made that very clear how bummed I am. OK, so now, looking at the damage, Brett punished himself for not having been able to warn intelligence sooner. If only he'd used Morse code to tell them something was coming from a shammy. If only he'd blink the name. Mohammed, yes, if only he'd blinked. The most common name in the world. That would have really keyed him in, if only I let him know John did it. OK, thanks for the info, Ben. Yeah. Ohh. It's so good in his name. In his heart, he knew it wouldn't have helped. Yes, I agree. America had blinded itself in the name of peace. OK, OK. And Brett knew that hope wouldn't buy peace anyway. He turned his back on the Hudson, where the sunken bridge still lay slumbering under acres of water, the calm of the surface masking the graves of thousands of Americans. The American public. Called the Iraq War Two bloody, the Afghanistan War Two costly; Combined, America lost fewer than 7000 people, period. Now, on one day, they lost far more than that. It's funny because Big Ben is trying to justify the War on Terror, and the only way he could do it is by inventing a fake terrorist. It's amazing. It's so beautiful. It's see in my book, they killed more people than we lost in the wars that we lost. It's like, it's like slippery slope, the novel. Like it's so good. Ah, I love it, but I love it. What if. Yeah, what if. And then I'm right. OK. Good point. Yeah, I guess. I guess then you're right, man. Yeah. Yeah. Then yeah. Yes. Bit. Well, no, you still wouldn't have been right because again, this terrorist attack was launched by Iran. One of the. Yeah. Like, OK. Which none of like, the actual interplay with the terrorist makes a whole lot of sense in this either. But but still, Ben, right? I mean, wrong. And then you're just. Oh, wait, no, no. It was one of Iraq's weapons of mass destruction. OK. Yeah. Alright. Yeah, they were right. Yeah. Yeah. That's why the. Yeah. Yeah. Rock is justified. Because in this book they were right. It wasn't there. Why? In the book? So it's OK. Saddam's revenge. Unbelievable. Which is normally a term for diarrhea. Yeah, I mean, it was, yeah. So the airport felt like a mausoleum. He gets sent to the airport, by the way, completely empty, completely deserted, the plane said at their terminals. Like sleeping grasshoppers. Well, that's a weird one that's maybe take another pass on that. What are you comparing plates to? Grasshoppers sleeping? I mean, I guess they have wings, but so do things that look more like play, right? OK, babe. I mean, like it's in the name they like. They hop pick a book. Yeah, what? Ohh, dragonflies. I don't know you also. Like, just like don't do the metaphors, just don't do it. I guess that was a simile, but like, come on man. So Ben is with Port Authority and security in the closed down airport, looking to see like all the people who have entered the country and all of the flight manifests to see if this terrorist had come into the country, he tells one of the officials. I want access to the customs files, if you don't mind me asking, Sir, murmured the official. Is there somebody we're looking for particularly? Brett said yes, an Arabic looking young man. Ohh, which is clearly like he's trying to justify racial profiling, but also like the least useful. Yes, that will narrow it down to thousands. That's and, like, that's that's the point. Like, that's why exactly. That's why it's bad. Why it's bad. But it's there's too many, there's too many layers. A slightly better hack writer would have had him, like accurately describe the man and then had like some histrionic, you know, official be like, that's racial profiling and being. It's not racial profiling. Just to point out that he has, you know, that he's an Arab man and he has these features and like, that's again would still be a bad book, but that would be like a. Competent, ****** writer? Yeah. A better, smarter person. Yeah, a better right wing, Grifter author would have done it that way, but Ben is again a complete failure of him and just incapable. Incapable of any rules. Honestly, it's amazing. The best thing about them, yeah. Yeah, the official complaints that that's racial profiling. Which it is because the only detail Brett gave is that he's Arabic. Looking, looking, looking. That's. Oh my God. Ohh God, losing my mind. You're not doing the profiling. I am. Well now I'm a party to it. Brett stared into his face. I don't care. Just do it Sir. It's against regulations though. Look, Brett burst out losing his patience. I don't give a rats *** at this point, whether it's racial profiling or not. Maybe you're right. Maybe Mohammed is a light skinned Norwegian woman or a Cherokee elder. Maybe he's a Persian or Arabic or maybe he's a feel like I'm listening to him talk right now. I know it should it's good. Or maybe he's a Persian or Arabic looking *** ** * ***** who hangs out with other Persian or Arabic looking **** ** ******* who look like Ibrahim Ashame which is, you know, Ben, they're different ethnic groups, Persians and Arabs. I don't care for this. Yeah, it's like being like, yeah, he's a Mexican or an African person, you know? Like, like that. Like it's that level of racist. Like it's he's the person from one of two massive land masses, you know? Look, again, making the case for why racial profiling is bad. Like, he's doing all the work for us. Yeah. It's just incredible. Yeah, I mean, it it is it is like, it. It's that racist. It's as racist as being, like, he's an African looking person. It's like, well, but that's a giant landmass that includes a wide variety of different ethnic groups. Like, yeah, I know he's Persian or Arabic. Thank you, Ben. That narrows it down. You got it. You got it. You definitely understood what we said. Yeah. And responded accordingly. Yeah, it's great because this is supposed to be like, how him explaining, like how racial profiling. Really necessary to stop terrorism. But all it actually is is like, showing that all bin once is racial profiling. He's not saying, like, this isn't. It's usually pointed as like, well, look, you know, if if if we get a solid tip that, like, a terrorist is a man of Afghan descent, you know, we can't. You're saying we can't, like, look for people who are of Afghan descent, who are in the area and, like, that's wrong. And like, that's again is a wrong line of argument. But there's at least more, it's at least more of an argument than bin who is saying, like, let's profile. All of the Persian or Arabic looking **** ** ******* right? Like he's not, he's not actually saying anything. There's no argument here. He's just saying I want it so I'm gonna have my character yell about it and yeah, be proven right by the circumstances that I write in the book. And also been, again, the lack of research here, one of the things that Brett notes is that there would be hundreds, maybe thousands of possible leads, men who had flown from the Middle East through some point in the days there would be 10. The Middle East is large bid on. There's so many people who come to the US and leave the US toward like heading there. It's it's big time. It's very big. So many places like, is the Middle East a country to him? Is that like what he like? Yeah, yeah, I think it is. I think the Middle East to him is like Idaho, like, yeah, it's a single place as opposed to a massive. Again, it's like somebody saying he looks Africans like, well, OK, does he look like he's from Morocco or look like like like there's all, all. Wide variety of countries and there's thousands of ethnic groups like it's a massive area. It's no, it looks like, yeah, very big continents. Yeah. It's it's, I mean of which you know the. Yeah, it's, it's it's great. It's it's very, very racist. Everything in this book is so good and OK, here's the best part. He realizes that there's too many names to search through point making the point that everything he's done at this so far is is useless. So he calls a contact of his name to Hassan Abdul to find a cafe to go meet, a contact who presumably is going to know about this guy, which is kind of been maybe making. The point, uh, that that racial profiling doesn't work didn't work right, because you needed to go contact us. There would be too many people have done that. Instead, you reached out to an individual who had pertinent information, maybe about an individual who you were looking for as opposed to, again, looking for Persian or Arabic **** ** *******. So the whole point of that section was just for him to be racist, right? And then not realize that he's making the case against it? Yeah. Well, he did it. You did. You got to do the racism scene, I guess. I mean, one of the many scenes in the whole book is the racism scene. Yeah. So he sits down from this guy. Oh, I guess that's his friend from high school. His his his black friend who I think converted to Islam. The one who taught him how to be funny to the bully with no name. Yeah, yeah, the the Jersey List football player. Yeah, just call just call your friend 1st instead of saying look for an Arab looking guy. Oh cool. So Binz's friend, the one positive Muslim person that we've met so far was was buddies with Anwar al Awlaki, who is like one of the who's like a ******* very ******** Islamic preacher. Who? Is seen as having an influence on, you know, terrorists. Uh, so. And then he he's, he's he's now helping Brett out because on September 11th, he'd seen the yeah. OK, cool. So, so, so Ben's Ben's one. Positive Muslim like character was also friends with a with a with an extremist. Yes. Still still terrorists. Still still terrorist adjacent. Yeah. After September 11th, Hassan spoke to Brett, and Brett set up a covert meeting with the Federal Bureau of Investigation. Hassan Abdul became a mole. His jobs changed over the years, as did his location. His responsibility under the Bush administration had been to provide leads on possible terror suspects attending mosques in prominent urban areas. For the past few years he'd been stationed in New York City. At the mosque, he posed as a borderline radical. We spoke regularly about the injustices of the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, but during OK, so yeah, he's he's he's been a he's been working with the FBI, yadda yadda yadda. Because he found out that all Muslims are terrorists. Yeah. And then we point Ben points out that under the election of Mark Prescott, who is white Obama, the FBI no longer monitored mosques and that that is clearly a bad thing. Yep. Cool. Wait, wait, I forget. What year was this written? 2016 is when it was published. I guess he probably wrote it 2015, 2020, 1425, or during a weekend in 2016, given the care he gave to editing this. Yeah. Yeah. So he gives the information about this terrorist he's looking to to his contact guy says it's not a lot to go on. How do you know he's coming to New York as opposed to some other city? How do you know he wasn't involved in the original attack? Is the government even locked down the ******** who planted the bombs? I don't know, Hassan. All I know is there's something more to this. And I know that he is religious. The way Shami spoke to him, if he's here, the only way to find him will be through the mosques. Uh, that's good. They talk some more. He's got to convince his friend, who's angry because the FBI isn't profiling Muslims anymore. This is getting somehow darker. Yeah, it is. I'm gonna read the last bit of this because it's very strange writing. You don't need to convince me, white boy. I just need to know why I'm doing this. And it isn't for your president. Believe me. Not at Brett. Neither am I. Hassan nodded. Lot of nodding. Here. I'll be in touch when I've got something for you. He turned toward the door. Then turned it back. There's good and bad in everyone, he crooned, a smile suddenly creasing his lips. We learned to live. We learned to give. Brett left each other what we need to survive together. Alive. I think they're singing a song here, I guess. Yeah, it's rimy. Yep. OK. I'm guessing that's a song. Yeah, like a thing that they did together. Like it's it's like a friend thing that they do. Yeah, yeah, that's that's fine. I guess, like like they're like their little yeah. Spoken handshake, I guess. Yep. Yep. Yeah. OK. You know, Sophie, you know who won't surveil Muslims pointlessly and. Because of racism. That's not **** on these products. Mint Mobile offers premium wireless starting at just 15 bucks a month. And now for the plot twist. Nope, there isn't one. Mint Mobile just has premium wireless from 15 bucks a month. There's no trapping you into a two year contract. You're opening the bill to find all these nuts fees. There's no luring you in with free subscriptions or streaming services that you'll forget to cancel and then be charged full price for none of that. For anyone who hates their phone Bill, Mint Mobile offers premium wireless for just $15.00 a month, Mint mobile will give you the best rate. Whether you're buying one or for a family, and it meant family start at 2 lines. All plans come with unlimited talk and text, plus high speed data delivered on the nation's largest 5G network. 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And get the feel of nature so that you come to be fascinated, then you come to want to understand it, and then you come to love it, and at that point you want to protect it. And then we'll come to the sort of healthy world that I envision as a good future for us. And the rest of life on this planet. Listen to amazing wildlife on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. And we're back. Oh yeah. Ooh, yeah. Yep. Alright. You know, I do. You know, you know, Cody. All right. We're back to a New York City. I mean, that could that could have just been like you reading the book. Yeah, you know, you know, dash, you know. So New York City President Prescott iconic moments. These were the moments that Mark Prescott had always wanted. FDR standing before Congress declaring war on Japan. John F Kennedy in Berlin. Reagan at the Berlin Wall. George W Bush in the wreckage of the world. Dead center. And now Prescott, standing on the precipice of the Hudson. Oh my God, what a sentence. And now, Prescott, standing on the precipice of the Hudson River, with the Coast Guard still dredging the waters, with the wreckage of one of America's greatest public works projects mangled behind them. Up there. We got through it. Oh my goodness. Damn it. What a ride. Wow, Ben. What a sentence. Yeah, there are a lot of. Ohh you could have. Yeah, just generally. Just generally like. If you like go, just go through and open. You're listening because you're a huge fan and you appreciate feedback. Just go through and remove half the commas. And your sentences will be better. I also find it very, very funny that, uh, Ben seems really, really hyper focused on this idea of Obama. Only one thing these like moments, these publicity moments. He's like, I wanna look like FDR. I wanna look like this and has. I don't know if you know anything about the current President, Robert. I don't. Who do we? We have a president. We do. We do. He, one could argue, is like the worst at this exact thing, the most obvious about this exact thing that Ben cannot get out of his mind about President Barack Obama. Sorry, I'm sorry. President Barack Hussein Obama. Barry sotero. Do you remember that? You remember when that was the thing on the right? Wait, no. Ohh boy. Ohh man. Yeah, it was it used to be a like, yeah, they were convinced that that that that was his should be his real name for reasons that I don't know. I don't even remember what I used to know. Why? Like, yeah, they used to. Yeah, it stopped once everything got so much like worse once Trump became president. But like that used to be like a whole if you'd go to like free Republic where all of like the really old, like worst fascist Republicans were back before that was the norm in the party. They would all call him Barry Satera. It was very silly. Yes. And I suspect Ben did in private solutely. I'm. That's a that's a tab I'm opening for later. Yeah. Yeah. Keep take a look into that. So the President is obvious, is very excited because a bunch of people are dead. So he gets to give a speech. He's wearing a windbreaker instead of a suit like George Bush did, which is like, yeah, as if it's like a ploy as opposed to like, yeah, you're heading to a disaster area. You wouldn't wear a nice suit to like an active disaster. Like it's one of those things like. You don't even, like, I'm not even gonna, like, give Bush **** for that. Like, he wasn't doing it for a look, he was doing it because he was headed to a disaster area and you're gonna wear right? Not a fine suit for that. You know, if you did wear a fine suit, he would be called like a coastal elite fancy man is wearing a suit to a thing he shouldn't have worn a suit to. Nonsense. Utter nonsense. Also been capitalized his windbreaker, which is weird. To me it doesn't seem like a like a proper noun, but OK, that is weird. That is weird. We're concerned about his editor. Like, I don't think there is one. I really don't think he had one ohm. There's like, there's no way, there's no way he had one. Like, it's like that that that would be, I would be. I would be surprised if we would have. We would have to hunt his editor down. Yeah, with that stream should be fired. I mean, Ben should be fired out of a cannon. Could be that person should be, fired, right, away,. But also windbreaker. Windbreaker is not capitalized. Like, no, it's never, never ever. Unless it's like the name of a boat, right? Right, yeah. Or like, like the brand of of of the windbreaker. Yeah, if it's a windbreaker. Brand, brand windbreaker, yeah. I don't know why, but that's my favorite part of this book. Yeah. Very cool. Yeah, I'm upset that the president didn't wear a suit, I guess, at the thing. And really, once that photo op, the photo op president? Barack Obama always care about photo OPS. No presidents after him care no more about. He's the only president who, like who like got his picture taken ever. Mm-hmm. It never happened again. That was the single time that it occurred. And they would never again, like, create events just to have these sort of photo opportunities. Yeah, never. Yeah. He would never, like, have people tear gassed in order to take a picture with the Bible, right. Like, that would be bad. That's that's ridiculous, Robert. Yeah. That, like, you should you should be writing fiction. That's an Obama thing. Yeah. Yeah. Classical vote stuff. Yeah. The president gives a speech. All right. I'm going to read a speech. My fellow Americans, he said we've experienced the greatest single attack on American soil in our history. Two days ago, we lost thousands of American lives with men, women, children. But let our enemies hear this. We remain strong. We remain unbowed. We remained unbroken. And wavering unshaken, we stand together in our unity is our power. Today our enemies rejoice in our tragedy. Tomorrow they will see us rebuild from these ashes, restore what was once, what once was. Rebuild our America. Better, stronger than it was before. They hope that their destruction would cause us to question ourselves, question our course. They hope that we would surrender our philosophy, our way of life. They were right, yadia. This is a boring, boring president. Doesn't seem very it's yeah. Yeah, like, why even write all this out if it's also OK. So because it's not even saying anything about him president or like, anything. It's just like, yeah, the basic president ****. Like, OK, OK, so he's he's giving his speech and he's about to hit the big moment that he's been excited for. And then someone in the crowd screams, you did this. Prescott was momentarily startled. Then he began in times of grief, we do not walk alone yet. Yeah. He's continues. Then someone interrupts again and yells, you did this, Mr. President. And suddenly, yeah, he sees a lone protester. It was a woman, overweight, wearing faded jeans and AT shirt with holes in it. Her hair hair cropped short. You did this, Mr. President? My husband is at the bottom of this river because of you, Mr. President. So yeah, he gets, he gets distracted from this. He tries to continue his speech. She says she's owes him all answers. Doesn't really, not really clear why it would be the President's fault, I guess because he he he pulled out of Afghanistan. Yeah. Yeah. I've been wondering what their yeah saying. About what he did other than just, like, be the President while this happened. Yeah. Or like, is it just like, it seems to also just be another, like the that guy who shot a liar during the state of the Union at Obama, right? Yeah, it seems like that's what he's doing. Yeah. So he lets the woman speak, being the monster that he is, and she's very grief stricken. And she talks about her husband, who of course served in Vietnam and then was a bus driver, I guess. Yeah, he just punched. Ohh. God, he's doing the Obama thing again. OK, so she asked him. How could you keep us safe? She stared at him, eyes glowing, and then he suddenly saw a way forward. He leaned forward, let a tear, rolled down his cheek, and hugged her. She tried to pull away. Initially, he held her tighter. Finally, he felt her *** against his chest, the tension go out of her body. The cameras flashed around him the moment time stood still. This was the image he'd been seeking ever since his election. Compassionate, caring, straight. Yeah, he does it a second time. Do. You already did. All of all of the villains in this are Barack Obama. Clear is that Ben wrote a book with multiple bad guys, and all of them are Obama. All Obama. Oh my God. And, like, the worst thing about they're all Obama. And the bad thing about them is that they cry. Yeah, yeah, they let out a single tier. I cannot believe he did that again with a different person so close to the other time. It has not been that long. Like, at least spread them out, you know? Wait. A couple of chapters. Don't I? I would have forgot. We would. We would have forgotten about it. Yeah, because there's so much terrible **** going on. Just like, spread it out, man. Uh, yeah. And then this President, who is again a monster, admits that he and the government made mistakes. Weak, weak. Yeah, yeah, it's it's great, he says that, like also, some of the mistakes were that we struck out in aggression in the Middle East, which like inspired more anger against us and maybe helped make the attack. We go to war to protect ourselves, but we end up weakening ourselves. An objectively true statement. I. Lynn, Ben, you keep making amazing points. Even the guy you've said you're going to vote for in 2020 for President, Donald J Trump says that we weakened ourselves by invading Iraq and Afghanistan. Part of why he got elected. That's it's so it's such simple ****. It's it's amazing really. Like I love. Everything that happens in the world, it's so good, Ben. Keep writing and write another book. But he's making a fiction. Yeah, so I can read it. Yeah. He's got a he's gonna where America is going to rebuild. We're going to raise this bridge again. Evil behavior by the past. Evil our swords will be beaten into ploughshares. He motioned over to the thousands of American troops now working along the shoreline. Our bravest and finest men will be put to work rebuilding. No more nation building abroad. Thousands upon thousands of those men and women are coming home to coming to New York to rebuild, to revitalize. It's time to build ourselves up here at home. What a horrible thing. I am this is. It's just, this is beautiful art. I can't even. Yeah, you guessed Ben. Good idea. Yeah, good idea. Yes, bring them. The worst thing we could do is stop ******* around in other countries with our army and instead use them to, I don't know, fix the bridges that are falling apart things and create stuff for for each other. Like, yeah, what is what I what is the problem he just wants for. It's just weird revenge ****. He wants to like. It's weird revenge ****. It's also like, weirdly, I also think he's making attacks. FDR here for like the works Project Progress Administration or the not just stuff which from really one of the best things the government ever did was be like, what if we what if we took all these starving people and gave them jobs to make parks and roads and **** that discussed will be usable by all Americans. No, no. Yes thank you. Make parks and stuff that people still camp in every single day. It's called the OR 80 years later. It's yeah, it's amazing. Yeah, safety does not come through the fear of a gun or the height of our walls. Safety comes from love. Yes, love for each other. Again, this is the bad guy. Like when like I'm like I really. I know it's not going to happen, because of course it's not because I I know who wrote this, but like, I'm waiting for like, the actual evil thing. Right. Like, what's the thing that he does where any where a normal person would read this and go, oh, that's a villain because like, you did like, that's like a thing you would do in like a good thing is have this characters like, oh, they seem like pretty good actually. And then like, oh, they turned, they were, they revealed this here's what they're actually about. He's going to, like, embezzle all of this money or something from his his program and whatnot. Like, but no, something he wants to build bridge. He wants to use U.S. troops. Like improve infrastructure at home and not waste money in foreign wars, thus making him the devil. It really, it really doesn't seem like there's going to be a turn. It seems like this is what we get, like what chapter is this? I think there's going to be a very sudden turn. That makes no sense. But we are like 2/3 of the way through the book at this point. OHS. OK, so the the end of the book there will be like, I'm I actually wanna do the genocides or something like that. I'm here to kill all white people or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Ohh. Great. So yeah. The president. Uh. The next scene is the president relaxing in his hotel room, watching TV. Uh. The coverage was nearly universally aesthetic. The one guest commentator on Fox News had the gall to ask whether the president had any leads on the perpetrators. Again, no one. No one would have a problem with that question after a massive terrorist attack. Like it would be the thing we'd be talking about. Yeah, Ben famously hates presidents that spend all their time watching Fox News. Yes. My God. All right. Yeah. All right. All right. So the president's concern or the President's aide is concerned that Brett Hawthorne is in New York? Yadda, yadda yadda presents like, why should I care? Uh in, the aide says, well, he's digging around flight manifest and he's asking to see pictures of Arabs first. Jesus Christ, the President says racial profiling right after the love speech, and they say the media will probably figure it out pretty soon. I mean, these things have a way of leaking. Yeah, OK. That's also like, kudos to Ben for writing that line, which I think is actually, like, racial profiling after the love speech. Yeah, it's so, like, it's such a. It's so childish. What a childish way to frame it. I love it. Good. Yeah. Yeah. It ends on the president watching his speech. And like the last line from his speech, vengeance is gods, we know our job is to build. Again. A monster. The literal devil. A guy who wants to rebuild bridges. He must he must be stopped. We must must be stoned, sister. Pretty if he were allowed to continue on his path of evil, eventually we would choke to death on all of the bridges there. He that's his evil plan. He wants to make too many bridges. He wants to drown us in bridges. Yeah, he wants to murder us in bridges. He wants to choke us in an endless river of infrastructure that allows us to safely drive without our bridges collapsing. It's like the devil would do. Yeah, the devil in the single tier for all the all the bridges that caused it. I can't even yeah, well, Cody, we're three more chapters in. That was three chapters, yeah. Like 3 decide if that was too long or too short for three chapters. I feel like I've lived 1000 years. Ohh I'd like this is an eternity. We're we're never gonna leave. We're stuck here. No, this is we're we're stuck in true allegiance forever. We will never escape true allegiance. It is it is the alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end. And like Ben sentences, it never hit, never conclude it, never actually, but him Dash concludes like a sentence should do, second to—but because Ben doesn't like to use, periods, which. Which would conclude that meanwhile. I can't wait until the president either turns comically way too evil to be believable, or continues down this this path of just like. Basic good stuff. You know what I love, Cody? What's that? The written word. I know. I know that about you. Yeah. So have your feelings on Ben's novel changed? We're now 60% of the way through. I it's changed in that I get more of it. Can I just say more of more of it? Yeah, my thoughts. But more. Yeah. It ebbs and flows. It's really it's really it's really something to behold. I. Because you you think you think it doesn't end. You think it doesn't stop. You think like, oh, surely you can't like, show his *** anymore. Surely the mask couldn't possibly slip anymore. Surely. He couldn't write another just awful, awful sentence. It's amazing. I like. I wanna collect and frame all of the bad sentences in this and then send them to Ben Shapiro via a registered Courier. And like here, here are the sentences you wrote that are not. They're not sentences, Ben. But I want to do immortalize them. Here are some not sentences for you to check out. Fire your editor or hire an editor, whichever one you didn't do. Yeah, hire and fire a series of editors until you get someone who's willing to tell you. To use a *******. Ben. It's OK. That's my message at the end of this. I don't hate Ben Shapiro. I don't want ill to befall him. I want him to know that it's OK, Ben. It's OK to conclude a sentence. You can do it. You can do it. We believe in you and of sentence. Cody, you got any pluggable to plug? Sure, why not. I got a YouTube channel called some more news. We got a patreon.com/somemore news and a podcast called even more news. We also coast a podcast with Robert Evans. It's called worst year ever. We have some more news, actually has a movie that we released a couple of days before you listen to this. So check that out. It's fun and about a lot of stuff. And I don't know doctor, Mr Cody on Twitter, all that, all that jazz. You know, I do want to make one note. Before we roll out, there is some evidence that Ben Shapiro has improved in the second-half of his novel that he's learning as he's writing, which is that we went through three whole chapters and he never randomly switched from a perspective character to a completely different character in a wild, least jarring transition. That is true. He is growing. That's why he's such a skilled writer. Because, yeah, he does it for the first third of the book. So then you expect it to keep happening. You're like, oh, and when's this gonna happen? Then he doesn't do it. That's surprising. It's A twist. It's A twist. Exactly. I thought you were even worse as a writer than you are, but you've gotten slightly better because you written your book. Not the worst. Ohh, it's good times for everybody. Alright, well the episodes over. Please continue voting and or engaging in gunfights with fascist paramilitaries. Have a have a good Election Day and remember a tourniquet should be placed above the bleeding wound and then tighten it until the bleeding stops. America strong. Hello, I'm Erica Kelly from the podcast Southern Fried True crime, and if you want to go from podcast fan to podcast host, do what I did and check out spreaker from iheart. I was working in accounting and hating it. Then after just 18 months of podcasting with Spreaker, I was able to quit my day job. Follow your podcast. In dreams, let's break our handle the hosting, creation, distribution, and monetization of your podcast. Go to spreaker.com. That's spreaker.com. Hey there, it's Ebony Monet, your co-host for the San Diego Zoo's Amazing Wildlife podcast. In this special episode, we're speaking with Doctor Jane Goodall about the fascinating journey that led to her social discoveries on chimpanzees. So four whole months, the chimps ran away from me. I mean, they take one look at this peculiar white ape and disappear into the vegetation. In wildlife, on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. In the 1980s and 90s, a psychopath terrorized the country of Belgium. A serial killer and kidnapper was abducting children in the bright light of day. From Tenderfoot TV and iHeartRadio, this is La Monstra, a story of abomination and conspiracy. The story about the man who simply become known as. Lamaster. Listen for free on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.