Anything Goes with Emma Chamberlain

Emma prefers to share her thoughts with a microphone rather than a physical human being, so thank god she has a podcast. Recorded from the comfort of her bed, Emma talks at length about whatever is on her mind every week. Anything really does go on this podcast. Sometimes philosophy, sometimes a random story from 10 years ago, sometimes advice, and sometimes nothing at all. You never know what you are going to get, but that’s what keeps it interesting. New episodes every Thursday.

advice session #2

advice session #2

Thu, 14 May 2020 10:00

Emma’s back with another advice session with issues we can all relate to! Topics like how to move on from an ex, workout routines and tips on eating healthy, believing in yourself when others may not, ways to stay close with people during quarantine, and so many more. To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: Learn more about your ad choices. Visit

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Ramble no one is slowing down in this hiring race for the best talent and offering the right benefits may help you reward and retain your team, helping them feel valued, motivated, and ready for the future. And that can make all the difference for your business principal offers retirement and group benefit plans, customized to help you meet your goals. Your company's future depends on its people. Show them they are valued and give them the tools they need to succeed. Talk to your financial professional today about the right benefits. Retirement plans from principal and visit us at Principal Acom business. This message was brought to you by Principal Financial Group. But it's important to our wonderful lawyers that we share our legal name, which is the principal life insurance company, Des Moines, IA. For important information about our products, visit Hi everybody. Welcome to anything goes. With me, I'm Emma Chamberlain. I never say my own last name. It's weird. OK, it's weird. Because everybody pronounces my last name differently. I've heard every pronunciation in the book and I don't even know what the what the what the what the ****? What did I just say? I combined, correct? Improper? I tried to combine correct, improper, and then it made a new word. I'm stuttering today. I cannot speak for some reason. Maybe because I woke up at 8:00 AM and that's just like really, really weird for me. I woke up. Before my alarm and so I'm just a mess, but what I was saying was. I don't know how my last name is pronounced and everybody pronounces it differently. I say Chamberlain. I've heard Chamberlain. I don't even know how some people say there's this one way that people say it and I don't know how to say it like them because I've just, I'm so conditioned to say Chamberlain. It's like. Chamber it's like I'm a Chamberlain. I don't know how to explain it. I don't know how to explain it. It's not important, but maybe they're right and I'm wrong, or maybe we're all wrong and it's like Chamberlain or something. Anyway, that was stupid. Hate that I started out the episode like that. I don't really know what got into me, but today we're going to be doing advice session Part 2. I was going to save like doing another advice session for later, like maybe spread them out a little bit more because I just did one about a month ago, but I really enjoyed doing them and I feel like. The topics that I'm going to talk about in each one are going to be really different, so **** it. So we're here, we're doing another one. For those of you who don't know what advice session is, it's basically where I go on the Twitter at AG podcast and I have you guys submit some things that you need advice on and then I give you guys advice and. I kind of just hope that this will resonate with more people than just the person who asked for the advice, if that makes sense, because we kind of all be living the same life sometimes, and so I don't know, I think that one person's. Topic one person's area of. Weakness or needing help. I bet other people have that same problem, so. Before we get into advice, I kind of wanted to talk about how I've been doing. Turn this around, make it about me. I've been doing pretty good. My skin looks really good today. For some reason I'm having a good skin day. Not gonna put on a drop of makeup because this never happens. Gonna just ******* enjoy it while it lasts. Ah. I don't remember the last day I had. I don't remember the last time I had a good skin day, so I'm. I'm really ******* with that. It's crazy how much your skin like affects how you feel about yourself. Like when I'm breaking out I just wanna ******* hide in my room, but for once my skin looks good so I'm just going to enjoy it. On another note, I tweeted the other day that I've been doing too much self reflection. And if I do one more moment of self reflection I'm going to lose my mind. And that's very true. I've had so much time to self reflect recently, like so much. And it's like. It's so overwhelming. Like I'm so overwhelmed. I just want relief from my own mind. Like I don't want to ******* think about myself anymore. It's good to self reflect and I know that, but too much is too much. Like I literally cannot think about myself. For another second. I don't want to think about me anymore. I want to think about others. I want to think about other things. I want to think about stupid **** I'm done, like thinking about myself and what type of person I am like. I've just spent so much time thinking about me and like who I am and who I've become, and I think it's a good thing, but I think it gets to a point where it's just you're beating a dead horse. I'm beating a dead horse thinking about myself like I actually have run out. But I've also run out of thoughts in general, like. I've I feel like I've thought about everything there is to think about, talked about everything there is to talk about. I'm literally spent. Like I don't have any more things left in my brain. I I've literally used it all up. So anyways. I don't know what I'm gonna do about that. I think that once this is all over and I can kind of, we all are gonna get back to our **** like it's going to be a lot easier to like. Have things to talk about, but I just feel like I've literally run out of things to talk about or think about, so I'm excited to. Return return to normal life so that I can kind of like. Have a normal thought process again and not be spending like 50% of my day, more like 90% of my day like. Trying to. Analyze my entire existence anyways, so that's what I've been doing. It's been making me a little bit uninspired in some ways, which is a drag, but. We're going to get through it and you guys don't want to hear about this. So let's get into advice again at AG. Podcast on Twitter if you guys wanna ask. Questions or ask for advice, I'm here. This is like my favorite thing ever to do, and I hope that you guys like this kind of series that I have going on. If you like it, let me know, and if you hate it, let me know, but I'll still probably do it anyway. Let's get into it first thing. Somebody said. I'm having a hard time with missing people during quarantine. I haven't seen my boyfriend since the middle of March and it's the hardest thing I've ever had to do. FaceTime is not the same. Do you have any tips and how are you coping with missing people who you haven't been able to see? I totally get this because. You know. Even though you can't, I mean, obviously the advice that I feel like most people would give would be. Just FaceTime them. Like more or something. I don't know. FaceTime is not the same. I actually hate FaceTime personally. Like, really hate it. I feel like it's so awkward. There's something awkward about it. I can't put a finger on it unless it's with somebody that you're super close with. I just feel like FaceTime is just kind of uncomfortable. And I totally understand. I totally understand how you're feeling. And to be honest, I feel like. It's one of those things where it's kind of out of your control, you know what I mean? There's nothing that you can do. It's not like you can just *******. Turn on a switch and like it's over and you don't feel it anymore. It's not like there's one thing you can do to like stop missing people. It's just always gonna be there. But I think that something that helps me. Is when I'm kind of sitting by myself and I'm missing somebody. I like to kind of envision like what I would want to do with that person when I see them. Like for example, like I miss my dad and my because I just saw my mom, she visited tell me move, but I haven't seen my dad in. Three months or so, and I miss him a lot. And so if I'm like, really missing him and it's kind of making me upset or anxious, I'll just like picture what I would want to do with him, like I, you know? My dad surfs so like I envisioned my dad taking me to surf. In my head. And I kind of just picture it and it makes me feel better, even though it's like not really being with him, like imagining. Me surfing with him like makes me feel really good and even though it's not like a real experience, it kind of can make you feel like. More connected with them in a sense. I can't explain it. That might not work for everybody, but I think. Communicating with them as much as possible and just kind of manifesting slash envisioning being with that person. I think that that really helps and. Instead of being sad about it, just get excited about how good it's gonna feel when you get to see them. Because there's nothing you can do. You know what I mean. So the best thing you can do is try to. Make it kind of positive in your head by getting excited rather than being sad. I know that. That's. Easier said than done, but. Try that out, let me know if it works. Moving on. Another person said advice on pursuing your dreams even though people don't show support or don't approve of it. Please give advice on this question. I really need it because I want to become an actress but nobody believes or approves of it. You know. I have a. Conspiracy? I have a little conspiracy. On this. And I think it's that. When people don't support you in your dream. I think that. That's like the greatest gift. And I know that that might seem weird. But I'll explain. I think it's the greatest gift to your passion when you have some doubters. Because, number one, it gives you somebody to prove wrong. #2, it forces you to do it by yourself. And #3. It forces you to decide. Whether or not it's truly your passion, because if it's not truly your passion. The doubters will shut you down immediately, and then you just don't even try because you're like, I I'm not passionate enough about this to like, push through that same thing with like the other things I just said. If something's truly your passion and you feel really, truly want to do it. You can do it all by yourself. You don't need anyone else, OK? And that's tough, though. It's tough when you don't have people standing there. Telling you that you can do this and telling you that everything's going to be OK and telling you that it's not stupid, whatever, like that does help. But I think that when people are doubting you, it forces you to find that within yourself, which is an amazing thing that will give you longevity in whatever your passion is. If you can get through the part where everybody doesn't believe in you, then you can ******* do anything, because that is the hardest part. Don't listen to anybody else. Don't talk about I, OK, I I've always seen this on. I think I saw a tweet about this once. It was something like. Don't talk about it. Until you've done it. And I kind of believe in that in a sense, because I feel like sometimes talking about your dreams and **** like that. It can kind of discourage you in a sense, because people's reactions might not be what you want. Go get that **** on your own. You know what I mean? Go do that **** by yourself. If you have a few people in your life that like, support you and believe in you and our and our positive, uplifting people, share that with them, but with everybody else, stay silent about it. Get to work. Start working on that ****. And then. Once you know, once you have something to work with, then you show them and be like, look, look what I did. I did it. So **** you. And then that's that. Find that passion within yourself and find that drive within yourself and everything else will come. Baby's moving on. Next advice on talking to Slash, having a thing with slash, dating a guy that was crazy. But I know exactly what you meant by that anyways. Advice on talking to slash, having a thing with slash? Dating a guy who lives in a different state that you met on Tinder? Is it reasonable? How do you stop having feelings for somebody if you know that you're already in too deep? Well, number one, you didn't specify whether or not you've met them. So I'm going to assume that you haven't. Or I'll assume that you have. I mean, I guess I could just do both. You know, if you really, truly have a connection with this person and you feel like you and them get along really well. And you feel like the feeling is mutual, and you feel like they're a good person. Run with it. Like let yourself have fun. The worst thing that could happen is that you're going to get heartbroken. And heartbreak. Is a ******* motivator. I always every time when, like, heartbreak makes you do ****** ****. Like, for some reason, like, I feel like every time I've been heartbroken, I've been like, I've turned around and been like. **** it. I'm gonna do something cool and I like create something cool. Umm. So that's the worst that could happen is that you get heartbroken and then you ******* find somebody else. Enjoy this time. Like even though you met them on Tinder. That's what the ******* Internet is for. Like I always used to be really anti like meeting people online. I was like, no, I want to meet somebody in real life and have a genuine connection. The whole point of the Internet like. It it's crazy out now. We're not like, we're not like, I don't know if that's the right word, but we're not, like, confined to where we live and ****. Like we can meet anybody we want, you know what I mean? Anybody so like? Enjoy that. Enjoy the fact that, like, there's no limits to who we meet and who we click with the chances of us finding an actual like. Person that is truly, really good for us. With the Internet is a lot higher. So, like, run with it, enjoy it. Make sure that you've met him in person or her in person. Make sure that you've like. Establish that real life connection, cause it's really easy to connect with somebody over the phone and then when you meet them, it's not the same. So make sure that you're, you know that you meet this person or you're calling this person. I mean, obviously there's a lot more to it, like physical chemistry. You never know if that's going to be there over the phone because that's something that's literally out of your control. Although I feel like usually it works, but like sometimes it doesn't and you know, you deal with that when it happens, but meet them, enjoy it. And the worst case scenario still isn't even that. You just have a little heartbreak and then you move on. OK, so if I were to host a live radio show and I could play any music I wanted. I would honestly probably have the time of my Life OK, but I'll admit I would probably end up playing. Just sad music. I don't know what it is about me, but I love sad music, OK? And so I'd probably end up playing. A lot of sad music. Specifically for the people who are listening in the car by themselves. That want to shed a tear in a good way? Well now there is a place that I or you or anyone can host a live show. Amp is the platform that allows people to come together and create live, unfiltered radio shows with whatever music or content that they love. And this is like a real show where you can have people listening live and you can pick exactly which songs to play, and you can even have fans calling in to chat while you're on air. If I had a live show, I would definitely. Have people call in and ask me for dating advice honestly, so I think I'd have to do dating advice. You know what this actually sounds like the perfect radio show. Sad music combined with dating advice, because all of the shows on AMP are run by real people. You can tell that the playlists are authentic. A playlist generated automatically just sounds different than one that an individual is controlling based on their passions and tastes. And with 10s of millions of licensed songs to choose from, everyone will find the music that appeals to them. But it's not just music. You can have a talk show, or react to news, or riff on pop culture, and that's one of the best parts about being a podcast host. You can just riff. On whatever. Excites your mind on any given day. So download AMP today in the App Store that's a amp, or ask Alexa to play AMP next. What's your advice for getting over somebody? I've been struggling with this guy who I've known for almost two years and it's always been super on and off. But I'm finally starting to accept that it'll never work. How can I stop thinking about the past, slash good memories so much, and start moving on? This podcast is so much fun and so helpful. I hope you're doing well. I love you. That's so sweet. I love you, too. Also, hope you're doing WellCare about you a lot. Let's get into it. Ah, this is the ******* worst. I don't know if I've ever talked about this. I think I have. But I think the way that you worded it was really specific. And and like, I want to speak on this specifically because I totally get it and it and it's always the thing that you need to remember is that the memories? Your brain. Cleans up memories. Your brain cleans up memories. At least my brain does. It cleans up memories and makes it seem so. It romanticizes the moment. Like I can guarantee that the memories you had with this person were not as great as you remember. You remember it as being this magical moment. But if you really think about it, there is probably 50 things going wrong. During it. That you just, like blocked out of your memory. I remember things as being a dream. Everything I remember, I remember it being so amazing. But then when I actually think about it and when I was actually in the moment, it was ****. OK. But when you're in this spot where you're like, still kind of in love with them. Or whatever, and you're remembering all the memories. Your brain is remembering it in the most beautiful way possible, which is so shady, and I totally get it. But you just have to remind yourself this is not the truth. Like, these memories weren't that great for one. And for two. I'm going to make even better memories with somebody new. Let me tell you, it's possible I didn't think it was. I've had so many memories with so many different people that I thought, like, Oh my God, I'm never going to be able to make memories like this with somebody else. Let me tell you, if they're not meant to be in your life and you still were able to make good memories with them, imagine the memories you're going to be with somebody who's good for you. And who isn't putting you through the ringer? Making it on and off, on and off. On and off. Imagine how beautiful those memories are gonna be. They're gonna be even better. It's really, really tough in the moment, and I totally ******* get it. I like it sucks. And don't stop yourself from remembering them. Like, don't shut your brain off, you know? Just be aware that you might be romanticizing the memories a little bit, but still, don't push them out of your head. Work through it. Let it pass and then move on. The worst thing you can do is like shut your brain down and be like, no, I can't think about that, I can't think about that. Let yourself think about it, but also be rational about the fact that it. That you might be. Remembering it a little bit in a way that's a little bit better than it probably was, and then move on. Umm. You're going to make memories with somebody new. That's actually. Healthy for you and. You're going to be OK. And let me tell you, when you do make memories with that new person, it's going to feel 50 times better because. You didn't believe it was possible. And then when it is possible, it's one of the best feelings ever. Because. You know, you proved yourself wrong and it takes time to get to a place where you're making those new memories with somebody new. It's not like that happens overnight. It could take years, it could take months. He just burped. But when you do make those memories, it's going to be really, really a beautiful thing. So. Moving on. Somebody asked me for a good workout routine, a little bit more of a less deep question, which I think we need sometimes over here. You know. Obviously, like I feel like for a workout routine, it's all about finding your thing. That's the problem is that it's always different for everybody, and I personally go through phases I feel like. I'm going to keep this broad because I feel like everything is so different. I feel like making sure that you get in a little bit of cardio. And a little bit of like either body weight training or weight training doing a little bit of both. Being balanced about it, that's the most important thing. Like, let's say you want to workout four times a week. I would say doing like and I'm not a ******* expert. I don't know what I'm talking about, but this is just what I enjoy to do because I feel like it's not impossible, but it makes me feel good. Doing like maybe 20 minutes of cardio, maybe an hour, who knows? But I don't like doing an hour of cardio ever. I usually don't surpass 45 minutes of cardio. That's where I cap I'm out just because I'm not huge into cardio, but it is important and it doesn't need to be anything crazy. You could go for a ******* hike, go for a walk, you could jump rope, run, cycle. I like all of those actually. I don't really like hiking to be honest. ****** me off, but I do like jump rope and I do like cycling, and occasionally I'll enjoy a nice jog. Recently I've been doing some jogs at around 6:30 PM. Outside because it's like the best time of day. It's like not super bright but like still light out. It's like the light is super soft and comfortable in your eyes and. The weather is nice, and so I've been running at that hour and it's really, really great. And I actually call my mom or my dad when I'm running. So I talked to them while I'm jogging and I found that that's really helps because I'm not all caught up in my own head. I'm like talking to somebody else and I'll run for like 20 minutes, 30 minutes and just a nice light jog, nothing crazy. And then I'll come home and do a little. Workout for Target 1 area. Maybe it's like a little AB workout, maybe a little arm workout, maybe a little bag workout, maybe a little leg workout, maybe a little **** workout. And then I call it a day and I shower and then I get in bed and I feel great. So it's all about working through, trying to figure out what makes sense for you and what feels good. It's not about like going really hard and going really crazy. It's about getting a little sweat in and enjoying yourself because working out can be so enjoyable. And I think people put themselves through hell trying to like do these crazy workout plans that like. Don't work for them and are not enjoyable and just suck ***. Do something that you enjoy. That's what it's all about. Now we're going right well. Now we're full 180 and we're going very deep. Somebody said. The topic I'd love for you to talk about is the afterlife. Like what happens when you die and all that. I was having a ******* existential crisis about this yesterday, and I'd love to hear your take on it. This is something interesting. You know it, it is kind of a sensitive topic, and I get that because it's it's very like there's a lot of different beliefs around it and like some of it is religious and some of it is just. Belief in general. I would maybe a different approach to all of it than maybe most. I'm I didn't grow up religious, so. I'm not like a religious person, so I don't know much about that. And so I've kind of come up with my own. Like assumption, I guess, just so I can sleep at night. I think the way that I. Don't freak out about it. Is that I've kind of just come to terms with the fact that I don't know. And that nobody knows for sure. And then nobody will ever know until it happens to them. And that that's OK like. I have some ideas about what I think happens I mean. Part of me. Thinks that it just goes black and it just ends. And you know, your soul leaves your body and it goes into the universe, and then what happens next is something that I can't understand part of me. You know, there's even the whole. You know, having in health theory, that could be real. Anything could be real. I I don't know. I don't know. I have no idea. And I'm OK with that. Like, I'm I've come to terms with the fact that I don't know what's gonna happen when I die, but I found the peace in knowing that it's going to be OK. It's going to be OK no matter what. It it, there's, it's. It's a part of all of this, and it sucks and I hate thinking about it. Umm. I think that. Living in the moment. And not it's not a bad thing to not think about death like. I try my best to not think about what it's gonna be like when I die, because that takes away from. Me enjoying living on this planet. So what's the point of that? I mean, obviously sometimes these things come into our heads and we have to, you know, address them in a sense, but. I try my best to just not think about it too much. And not to freak out about it, because I just don't really see a scenario where it's gonna be that bad. I think it's gonna be OK. Umm. But we won't know until it happens. We'll never know. And so finding peace in that is huge. Somebody said, do you have any advice on how to tell your parents that you need help with your mental health? I know you had to tell your parents that you needed to quit school because of depression and that. That must have been so hard to open up to your parents like that. I was just wondering if you had any advice on how to be more open or talk to your parents about mental health without feeling ashamed or embarrassed. Well, for one, I know that when you're struggling with mental health. You know, at least in my experience, it it makes you feel like a burden and it makes you feel like. Your feelings and thoughts are not valid and like, that's, I think, why it's so hard to open up when you're in that spot, which is totally counterproductive, because that's exactly when you need to be opening up the most is when you're struggling. I think that you. Need? I mean, The thing is you can get creative with it. You could literally get creative with it, as long as you're able to communicate with them in some way. It doesn't matter. Literally. I just thought about this and I wish I would have thought about this when I was younger. I wish I could have written. Written it all down like written almost like a letter in a sense. Like kind of like a like, almost like a journal entry. Talking about how I feel in a safe environment by myself and then just give it to my parents and been like read this and then gone back into my room and waited for them. They read it on their own and then they can come back in and then they can talk about it. That's kind of a really. That's. I don't know. I don't know if that would work, but if you're really, really struggling with like. If I feel like the scariest thing is bringing it up. And I feel like if you can bring it up in a in a less confrontational way to start. That could really help, you know what I mean, so that you don't have to say the words. You wrote down the words. It's like you don't have to say them because sometimes that's not possible. But you need the help, so getting creative with that. I mean, there's no limit like doing that, but if you really. But if and then well, that will create a conversation though, but then it's like they already understand. So then you can just conversate and you don't have to worry about explaining yourself. It's like you can just get straight to the meat of it and just start. Talking about how you know you're gonna work through it and all of that, but I also think that you need to remember that this is nothing to be ashamed of. What you're struggling with is making you believe that your thoughts and feelings aren't valid. But that's not the truth. And if you can talk yourself out of that. And just gain a little bit of courage in that one moment to bring it up. It will be so helpful and I believe in you and you can do this. And I love you. All right, moving on. What does it really take to make it in New York City when you're young? The come up is a new freeform docu reality series on Hulu. It follows 6 ambitious creative 20 somethings in NYC as they break the status quo and take up all the space. It's a real look into how this next generation of icons are breathing life back into the downtown scene, all while pursuing their dreams, which is a long way of saying they're killing it. The show follows Sophia, a breakthrough photographer who shot her first spread for nylon at just 13 and has been shooting major campaigns ever since. Fernando Modeling's next international star, Tawfiq, the youngest fashion designer to show at New York Fashion Week, Claude, a New York native and aspiring actress. Ben arising, entertainer from Texas and a newbie to New York City, and Ebon, a trans rights activist and fixture of New York underground nightlife. This is now or never. With big goals and even bigger ceilings to break through, they'll need to bust their ***** to chase their dreams. It's time to hustle freeforms the come up new episodes Wednesdays on Hulu, all right, somebody said a little bit ago I lost one of the best friendships I've ever had because of a mistake I made. I've realized it now and I know I need to make things right with this person, but I'm just not sure how I also. Don't want her to reject my apology. But I also need to know. I also need her to know that I still care. Listen. Communication is everything. If you can, go to a person and say listen. I ****** **. I made a huge mistake. This is where I ****** **. This is how I plan on changing moving forward. And I'm really sorry and I understand. If you don't want to be my friend anymore, I get it. But I really want you in my life and I have learned from this immensely. And I don't want to live a life without you in it. I really, really want you in my life. And I am so angry at myself and. I'm so sorry. And I'm OK if it takes some time. But I'm always here for you, and I love you and I care about you, and that's that. If you say something like that, I can promise you I. If you truly did, learn from your mistake. I really, really think that anything can be worked out. There's certain things that can't. I don't even have an example, but it's like some things you just can't. Work through it. And usually it has to do with somebody being really stubborn. Like if somebody's really stubborn and, like, can't. See your point of view or whatever. That's when I would say that like. You just can't. Like, let's say you made, let's say you made a mistake. And then you didn't recognize that you made a mistake and you just. We're like, hey, can we just be friends again? And you didn't recognize how you ****** **? I would see how that's like kind of. That couldn't work, but you recognize your mistake and you're ready to move on and move forward because of that. I I think that you have a really good chance of being friends with this person, but the only way that they're going to know that you learned and that you are, and that you changed, and that you aren't going to do that again. Is by you telling them that and you also expressing your love and care for that person. And, you know, just reminding them that everybody makes mistakes and that like. You learned from yours and like you want them in your life. And I think that that I think that that's really gonna workout. I think communication is just. It's underrated. Somebody asked how to cut toxic people out permanently. I always go back to them for some reason because I believe they changed, but they always prove me wrong. Oh my God, I do this. I also do this. It's so tough. It's so tough because. I always give people the benefit of the doubt. And I'll give it to them infinite times. But it's true. A lot of people don't ever change, and a lot of people are just good at saying that they're going to change, or good at convincing themselves that they're gonna change, and then they don't. When somebody's toxic, I think. I don't know if this is good advice, but. You kind of have to go all or nothing. Right. Like you can't be half in, half out. You need to cut this person off. For good like. Don't text them and check in on them. Don't ask them to hang out once a month. Cut it permanently like. Just never speak to them again. Like, I know that that sounds obvious, but it's not obvious. People don't realize, like sometimes you just have to do that for yourself. Just cut them off cold Turkey. And then if they're like, dude, what the ****? Why are you just cutting me off? Be like. I feel like this friendship. Is not healthy for me right now and I need time. And then just take your time without them. And. It's OK to cut people off like that. There's nothing wrong with that. But it's kind of it, but it kind of has to be all or nothing or else it doesn't stick because then you hang out and then you're like, Oh my God, wait, they were actually really fun today? Well, yeah, it's easy for somebody to be fun, like once in a while. But then once you guys become really close again, the toxicness comes out and then you regret it, and then it's like ******* all over again. So it's all or nothing, you know? Somebody said how do you learn not to care about what people think of you? I struggle with this, but I feel like recently I've been doing a lot better about not caring about what people think, and I think mainly what it is is is. Low key like ******* with myself being like. Bing, thinking that I'm thinking that you are cool, like being like. Looking in the mirror and being like. I **** with that *****. Like, I really like her. Like, I actually think she's cool. I think she's a good person. Like, genuinely like thinking that you are cool yourself. And like feeling. Confident about. Who you are because, and I know that that's really obvious, but it's like. That's truly what it is. I don't care about what other people think of me when I'm proud of what I'm doing or I I'm proud of like. Who I am. I don't care about what other people think. I don't care what boys think. I don't care what. The Internet thinks I don't care what my friends think. About **** like if I'm confident myself. Then it's kind of like my brain is like, OK, well, they're either gonna get it and they're gonna like me, or they're not. And I don't care. Because. If they don't like me or they don't, **** with me. Then it kind of becomes their loss. Like, when you believe that, like, you're a dope person and if people don't get it, that's their loss. It's, you know, it's kind of narcissistic and cocky, but like, that's how you get to that's how you start to not care. That doesn't mean that you can, that you're blind to, like, other people and how they feel about you and like, whatever, like if somebody was like, hey, what you said to me was mean. That doesn't like just because you're confident doesn't mean you're like, well, that's your loss then goodbye. That's not what I'm talking about. It's more like. With creative things or with like, you know how you look and how you dress and whatever like. That's more what I'm Speaking of. Somebody said how to stop social media comparisons in your head. Take a break. Take a break from social media and live in the real world for like. Two days and just don't go on Instagram. When you take a break from social media, the bubble gets popped. Because when you're forced to kind of live in the real world again for like. A few days or even a few hours, and then you go back on your phone, you're kind of like, ohh wait, there's like an actual real world out there. It's not. This is not real. This is fake. Obviously, 90% of the **** on the Internet is fake. 99% of it more like is fake. The key is to just stay grounded in the real world. And then you won't. You'll you'll see through it. You'll see right through it when you see it instead of being like, Oh my God, you know. She looks it's. I think the problem is, is that when you spend too much time. On social media. It starts to like, convince your brain that everything is like real and that, like, all of it matters. I don't know why that is, but that's the effect it has on me. And so when I take a break and then go back to it, it kind of like. Sheds the light on the situation a little bit. None of it ******* matters. What matters is like the real life experience that you have, like the real life experiences that you have. That's it. I have some friends and family members who wear contacts, and honestly, I can't imagine how much of a pain it must be to always have to go to the eye doctor, go in for unnecessary tests. When you know that your prescription hasn't changed. It's so time-consuming and so stressful. I truly can't imagine one 800 contacts has been making people's lives so much easier and delivering contact lenses for 27 years. They make getting contacts super fast and easy. Even if you have a really strong prescription, all you have to do is order the same contacts you would get from your doctor. Just look on the side of your contacts box for that info. You can order online, over the phone, or with their app, and they ship them fast and free to your home. You can even renew your prescription. Mind using their express exam and there are so many benefits to going through one 800 contacts. They guarantee if you find your contacts at a lower price elsewhere, they'll beat it. And I mean, who doesn't like to save a little money? Speaking of which, new customers can get extra discounts when you check out their site, and their 24/7 customer support is so helpful that it's award-winning. So let one 800 contacts get you the contact lenses you need. Order online at one 800 contacts. Dot com. Next question. Somebody said peer pressure. Have you ever gave in to peer pressure? How do I avoid giving into friends who try to peer pressure me into doing something that I don't necessarily want to do? I'm going back to high school in my mind right now because I. I haven't really felt peer pressured. Within the past few years, luckily. I've kind of decided to like. I don't know. I just think I grew out of that pretty quickly. Luckily, I don't know why or how, but I did. But in high school I definitely felt peer pressure for sure, because everybody does. I mean, even now people try to peer pressure you, you know? And it's not even like they. I don't think people even mean to do it, you know? I think that it's more just like people like to feel company and what they're doing. And so like, you know when you say, no, I don't want to do that, it makes them question. Whether or not they should be doing it, and that makes them feel bad about themselves. And so. Here's what you do. You take like a. You take kind of like a lighter approach. Let's say you're at a party and somebody wants you to drink alcohol, right? But you don't want to. You're not into alcohol. You don't. You're not old enough. Whatever the reason may be, you don't want to. OK? Go about it. In a way where you're like. Oh no, I'm totally, like, take it lightly. You know what I mean? It doesn't need to be like, I think that that's the way it's best received is when you just kind of are chill about it. You're like, Oh no, I'm totally good. No need. I'm. I'm doing great. Whatever. And then they're like, yeah, but, dude, you're not going to have fun if you're not drunk with us. Whoa. It's crazy out here. Come on, have a drink. You know what I mean? And then this is where you say, honestly, I have more fun when I'm sober, but I really appreciate it. And, like, do your thing. Feel free to do your thing. But I'm good over here. I'm. I'm happy sober. Don't worry about me. I'm. I'm gonna be just as fun. Don't worry about it. Enjoy yourself. And just kind of like. Put it back on that be like. Hey, don't worry about me. I'm good. I don't. I don't need to. I don't. I'm not interested. But, like, enjoy it, though. You go for it, have fun, whatever. Like, you know what I mean? It's like making them feel comfortable. In the sense of being like, hey, that's all you you got this, like, do you know what I mean? And then you being like, but I'm good, I feel like that's the best way to go about it. And if they just keep, like, ******* pestering you about it. You just keep saying no, like you just keep being like, ah, no, I'm good. Like, I'm good. Like, don't worry about me. Like, you know, keep making jokes about it. Make a joke about it. I feel. In awkward situations, just make a joke. Because then it's just like, what are they gonna do? You know what I mean? You'll be OK. I think I've been peer pressured before. Not even like heavily, but it was like, you know more just because I wanted to fit in. And it makes you feel bad about yourself, in a sense, because you're like it it when you kind of give in to something and you don't listen to yourself and you listen to somebody else, that's really it can kind of **** with yourself, esteem and so. Being strong and not doing something you don't want to do. Is like the best thing you could do for your own self esteem and your own well-being so. Somebody said advice on eating healthy. I think doing. Research about what eating healthy means from, you know, reliable sources that are. Not like weird *******. Go to the facts, go to the facts and and, you know, research it. How? How do you feed your body the best? You know what I mean. Do that research, find that out, and then. And then do it, I think that. Educating yourself on on healthy eating is like the best thing you could do because. There's so much false information and there's so many things that are said, and I think that. The true, best way to eat healthy is to educate yourself on it and then to do it when it comes to like. You know, habits that help, I would just say. What what you have in your house determines what you eat, right? So. Obviously it's OK to treat yourself, have things around that are fun and that you enjoy, but have a lot of healthy foods in your house as well so that you at least have the option to reach for something healthy. I think when the healthy options aren't there, that's when you don't eat healthy. You know what I mean? It's like. Create healthy options at your house that are good for snacking that like you enjoy. Find healthy snacks that you enjoy. Replace your unhealthy snacks with healthier versions like I have. I buy these. These like chickpea puffs. That have like white cheddar on them and they're so good they reminded me of pirates booty, if you all remember that. Pirates booty is so good and it's just better because it's made with chickpeas, so it has more fiber in it and it's has protein in it and it's just better for you and they taste amazing. So it's about like replacing things that, you know, there's so many replacements out there. Do a little bit of food swapping, you know, like with pasta. I eat chickpea pasta. I don't know, my whole diet is ******* chickpeas. But like, instead of eating regular pasta, I eat chickpea pasta because there's more nutritional value in that more protein, more fiber. Umm. You know, more nutrients in general, and so I'll choose. See that instead of regular pasta when I cook pasta for myself. And it tastes ******* great. Tastes great, tastes like, I love it. It tastes like almost better than. Regular pasta and regular pasta is totally fine. It's just about like, you know, you can swap things out. There's like easy swaps that you can do that just are more nutritious for your body and whatever. But doing the research is huge, so do research and educate yourself on it all. It's 1111 right now and I want to make a wish. OK, I made a wish. Never gonna tell anybody what it was though. Somebody said one of my friends has been talking to me less since they've gotten a significant other, and I told them how I feel, but they said that quarantine is getting to them, so that's why give this person their space. Focus on you and wait for them to come back around. They will. When people get into relationships, I mean, even everybody. This is everybody. It's just ******* Standard Life. When you're like, newly in love with somebody. Especially when you're younger, I think you can just kind of fall ******* straight into it. And stop caring about everybody else because they think that you're scared that it's going to go away in a sense, which is not true. And I think that, like, you know, you learn that over time, let them go through this. They're going to need you eventually. They're just all wrapped up in this right now. Don't take it personally. It's not personal. They'll come back around. Just give them some time. Focus on you. Give them space. Remember, it's not your fault. And they'll come back around. This is very normal for like. When you have a friend that newly gets into a relationship and you're single, it's tough because you know. They have that person that they're dating, and you have them, but when they're not there, it ******* sucks. So take this time to. Be there for yourself. OK, last question. Would you recommend going on vacation with a significant other? This is my last question because I just think it's kind of. Random and funny. If you've been dating them for a long time, like. Six months plus? **** it. You're probably ready if you spent a lot of time with this person. Definitely if you feel like you're really close with this person and it's like, really. And you trust them and you feel like they're like. You have a good time with them and you feel like you can spend a lot of time with them and it's healthy, then yes, I would say I think traveling with your significant other can be an amazing bonding experience. I think it's actually really important, important to have those experiences with somebody that you're dating because it kind of takes things to the next level because you kind of traveling and experiences and stuff like that. It's all such a growing experience and I think it's really nice to have those experiences with a significant other so that you guys can kind of not only make those memories together, but like. Learn how you work together because you have to. It's like traveling is not easy. Like you have to. It's tough. So like. If you can get through all that together and not want to kill each other by the end. Then that's a really beautiful thing. So I would say travel with your significant other if it feels right. Maybe wait until you guys are really close first and you feel like you have a great foundation built and then do it. Or just ******* go on. I just farted and I can't tell if you heard it, so I'm just going to act like it didn't happen anyway. I say do it. I say do it. Maybe even just go on one day with them and then be like, **** it and we're going, who knows? So. Actually, that's really awful advice. Don't ever you need to go on dates in very public places in the beginning so that you don't get killed. So make sure that you're doing that. Be safe with dating everybody in every capacity, in every way. Be responsible and don't be impulsive and that's that. But yeah, go on a trip, go to the Bahamas for me, send me pictures, send me a postcard. With your BAE, **** it. Anyway, I have to do a virtual doctor's appointment right now with my dermatologist, so I have to go, but I really enjoyed talking to you guys. I hope you guys enjoyed this episode. I really love doing advice for you guys. I hope that it's useful. Feel free to tweet me topics that you want me to talk about at AG podcast. Don't forget to rate, review and subscribe to anything goes on. Apple Music, Spotify, wherever else you get your podcast. Rate anything goes. Five stars on Apple Podcasts if you want. I would mean a lot to me. I'd really appreciate it and I love you all. Keep it real. I'm praying for all of you. I'm thinking of all of you. I love all of you. And I'll see you all next week. We're here with Phil talking about what's new with heart Nissan. Phil, what are some good reasons somebody should buy now? That's a great question. We all know that car shopping could be an overwhelming process. Plus people are uncertain about a lot these days. Part Nissan recognize that? So we rolled up a heart rewards program. All new and pre-owned vehicle purchases get one year identity theft Protection 3 Virginia State inspections and multi point inspections. One year tire Rd Hazard with roadside assistance, a three day vehicle exchange and every purchase or service. Burns Heart rewards points. That's a ton of stuff. It's amazing. Offering all those benefits, it can really save people a lot of headaches and of course, money. Exactly. And we have even more savings right now. Get 0% financing on all new and certified pre-owned Nissan in our inventory. Phil, thanks so much for coming in. right, you got it. or check us out in the Apple App Store or Google Play Store. Use your head and trust your heart maximal finance $20,000 for 60 months with tier one credit approval with MC dealer for full details.