Emma prefers to share her thoughts with a microphone rather than a physical human being, so thank god she has a podcast. Recorded from the comfort of her bed, Emma talks at length about whatever is on her mind every week. Anything really does go on this podcast. Sometimes philosophy, sometimes a random story from 10 years ago, sometimes advice, and sometimes nothing at all. You never know what you are going to get, but that’s what keeps it interesting. New episodes every Thursday.
Thu, 04 Mar 2021 11:00
Acne is something a lot of us have dealt with or are dealing with currently. For some, it can be really difficult. Emma has had her own well-documented journey with acne, but it took a really serious toll on her both physically and mentally. She shares her entire story, from dealing with a ton of confidence issues, to depression, to all of the frustrations of treatments that weren’t working, and finally overcoming it. She shares tips on managing acne, how to get through it, and how to stay confident with it. To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Dad, who's are delicious? You need to show them. You should. Mom. No, seriously, let's set you up on Shopify. It's easy. I always knew you would build your own business, guys. Yum. When you're ready to bring your idea to life, build it on Shopify. Sign up for a free 14 day trial at shopify.com/offer 22, shopify.com/offer 22. Hello everybody. Welcome back to anything goes. I'm Emma Chamberlain, your host and your bestie. I think that's gonna be my new official intro. Let me know what you think. Umm. Before we get into the episode topic today, because I do have a topic. I need to fill you in on a few things. Uh, there's actually two things #1. Y'all. I. Have no social cues anymore. I have to tell you this story. Quarantine ruined me socially. I used to think of myself as being very. Socially savvy. I felt like I could talk to anybody. There was never an awkward moment with me like I used to be. You know, solid socially, I could. Have a conversation with a brick wall and it wouldn't even be awkward. Like, there was nothing that would make me feel awkward socially. That's not necessarily true. Like, I think that might be a little bit dramatic. I think I did. Obviously have awkward moments here and there, as everybody does, but pretty. That was pretty slim. Like, I was pretty solid. OK, well, I can tell you now that all of my social cues and social skills are ******* gone from quarantine. And here's a story that perfectly displays that. So I was at a flea market. A flea market is like an outdoor thrift store where a bunch of different sellers. Set up little tents and they have vintage clothes, used clothes, homemade clothes, stuff like that and I love going there. Because they have cute clothes for good prices and. It's all second hand usually and I love that. So I was there last weekend and. Uh, I was actually there with somebody else too. Which makes this story worse because they had to see this happen. Ohh, it was so bad. OK, so basically this girl comes up to me and. Basically, she she was kind of somebody that I'm connected to through business, right? But I've never met her before, so it wasn't, it wasn't. She wasn't somebody who watches my videos necessarily. She might be, but it was more of somebody who is connected to a company that I'd like to work with. Right and. She comes up to me and we're talking for a little bit and everything was fine. And then. I kind of got a little awkward because I didn't have anything else to say. And then she kind of got a little bit awkward because I think she didn't have anything else to say. And then she was like, oh, by the way. I'm going to change her name for this story. I'm gonna say her name is Olivia, although that's my best friend's name. But whatever. I'm gonna say her name is Olivia for the sake of the stories that I'm not ******* shouting this girl out. She said. Oh, by the way, my name's Olivia. And I was like, and I don't know why the **** my brain thought it would be a good idea to say this, but my immediate response was ohh I have a cousin named Olivia. She was like, OK, bye and walked away, guys. Guys. Why would I say that? Why would I say? Why would I say that? Oh, I have a cousin named Olivia. Emma, who cares? Emma? Who cares? Say. Well, she already knew my name, so I couldn't be like, Oh well, my name's Emma, because she we had already discussed. That was my name earlier. I could have just been like, Oh well, so nice to meet you, Emma. My cousin named Olivia. What the ****? And she walks away and immediately I go to the person that I had went to the flea market with. And I'm like, please tell me you didn't hear that I cannot sleep tonight if I know that you heard that and they were like. No, I didn't hear it. Like what did you say? And I told them and they were like, ohh **** like no that's. And then I called my mom later and I told her and she ******* laughed her *** off for like 45 minutes being like Emma. What the hell? So. That was super awkward. That's something that has been haunting me for. The last week since it happened, I listen. If you if this was you. And you're listening to this first. Whatever reason. I'm so sorry for that awkward remark that I made. I got uncomfortable and tense in my *******. Brain took over my body in the worst way and I said that and I'm embarrassed and that's not me. I never say weird **** like that. Like that was the first time I've ever said something that weird. Like I don't think I've ever said something that weird in that random like this girl probably thinks I am fully. A freak and I and I can't blame her. Like if somebody said that to me, I'd be like. OK, word like nice to meet you. The ****. Like, I I would definitely judge myself if I had met myself in that situation 1000%. So I don't blame her if she's judging me, but if you're out there, you know who you are. Your name's not Olivia, because that was the fake name I gave to you so that you know. I wouldn't call you out too hard, although I'm kind of just calling myself out, but. Olivia. Fake Olivia. If you know who you are, your name is not Olivia. Your name starts with an A. If you know who you are, I'm really sorry. OK. Anyway, another thing I wanted to talk about was that I got an at home cycling bike. OK. I before quarantine started, I was a huge cycling class fanatic. I would go to soul cycle multiple times a week, sometimes twice in a day. I just loved it. It was like my meditation. It was like my workout. It was like my community. I love that ****. So I was super into soul cycle if you don't know anything about cycling classes. It's basically where there's a bunch of stationary bikes. In one dark room and there's an instructor in the front, and you basically ride the bike to the beat of the music and you change the resistance. So sometimes it feels like you're going uphill. Sometimes it feels like you're going super fast and you're sprinting downhill. If you turn down the resistance, that's kind of the premise of the workout, and then towards the end you do a little arm workout with weights that are attached to the back of your bike. And then you call it a day. I think it's a great workout. It's one of my favorites because it's just. It's it's cardio, but it's easy on your joints and I have really sensitive joints from my cheerleading days. Slash gymnastics days if you will. And. So I joints are all ****** ** and I find that riding a bike feels better on my joints than running, and I feel like I get the same kind of sweat in and I release endorphins and it's just great. So I'm a huge cycling gal. I love it, but I haven't been able to cycle for basically a whole year because. Soul Cycle has been closed. So I was just doing other things. I was trying to go on runs. I basically have spent the whole year running actually, and I hate running. I love it and I hate it like I love it because it's easy. You just like. ***** ** shoes and then you go. It's free, which is another thing I like about it. It also does make you feel good, like afterwards you feel great and you kind of get used to running to like the more you run, the more you end up liking it. But I still deep down hate it as much as I could say that I like it, I hate it, whereas cycling I love. And so I finally got a *******. Soul cycle bike for at home it comes with the whole like. Screen thing. It's like a peloton but it's soul cycle brand. Because I'm very loyal to soul, cycle, whatever. And let me tell you, this thing is amazing. Like I've never ever spent. Money on like at home gym stuff ever. I've never done it. I just. Have never been able to justify it. But I really wanted this and so. Now I have it and I. Love it. I've only ridden on it twice, but I can tell you that this thing is amazing. It's like the best thing that's ever happened to me. They're definitely very expensive, but I did the math and. I was going to soul cycle so much that I actually would save money by buying a bike for at home. I was always against getting a bike for at home because I was like, well, the whole point is that I'm going for the Community element, but it sounds like there won't really be a community element to soul cycle. For probably another year, so this makes sense. Also, I kind of like that I don't have to leave my house to like. Ride on the bike. I can also ride on it at anytime. I don't have to like book a class. Also if I last minute wanna cancel the class I'm not wasting. X amount of money I it's all up to me. And that the classes are equally as hard. I mean, honestly, I'm obsessed with this bike. Guys like I I never thought that I would be that *****. It's like I'm riding my peloton or I'm riding my soul cycle bike and I love it, but I am now that ***** so. I don't know. I think it's better than having a treadmill too, because you can like, if I wanna go on a run, I'll just go on a run outside, get my fresh air. But it's really hard to mimic. Like, I feel like a stationary bike is a very different sensation. Like personally I live in LA. I can't just go ride my bike up hills and get a bike workout in. Like I kind of need to use a stationary bike. Listen, you could for sure bike ride in LA, yes, but am I scared of that 1000%? I'm very scared of it. I'm scared because I don't trust people in LA. I don't trust the drivers in LA. If I wanted to bike up a, you know, street or something, I don't trust people here. So **** no, I'm not riding my bike in LA ever. That's why I have a stationary bike. I don't even have to leave the house. It's amazing 10 out of 10 would recommend. The soul cycle, stationary bike and or a peloton, it's the same thing. But very good guys. It's changing my life. Like I literally was in such a ****** mood yesterday and then I hopped on that bike and I rode it for 45 minutes and I got off and I was like, you know what? I feel ******* good right now. The only problem is that it's a lot. It's the hardest workout I've done in in the whole year. I haven't done a workout that hard this whole year because I've just been like, going on jogs and, you know, doing light Pilates and stuff. Like, that's all I've really been doing. And these workouts are very hard, and I wake up in the morning and I feel like I got hit by a truck. Like I feel like I'm dying every day. That's the only hard part about it. Also, it kind of bruises your vagina when you first get started for some reason. Like bruises the muscles. I don't. Sorry, that's disgusting. Anyway, let's get into our topic of today, acne. I can't believe I haven't made an episode on this sooner because acne has been such a big part of my story on the Internet and also just my brand in general on the Internet, if you will. Although I hate that term. But you know, people just know that I've struggled with acne. It's like. A well known thing and the fact that I've never made an episode on it blows my mind. So today I'm gonna be kind of telling you my acne story, giving advice where I see fit and just overall having a discussion about it, like just my story. We're talking about Macy's again. My favorite one stop shop in such a beloved friend to anything goes. Macy's is the best because it really has something for everyone and every occasion. Whether it's clothes, HomeGoods, cooking Ware, whatever it may be, Macy's has something for you in the spirit of everybody having their own individual Macy's shopping experience. They're making us feel like true VIP's for the next couple of weeks because Macy's VIP sale has arrived just in time to get everything you need to cozy up this fall. From September 23rd to October 3rd, get 30% off regular sale and clearance items plus. 15% off beauty. And again, outside of beauty, that's 30% off. Pretty much everything from clothing, shoes and handbags to home decor and appliances. It's happening at Macy's. You want to know what I'm going to get? I'm going to get scarves because I really want to have a scarf. I live in California. It's only cold for like 3 months here, and it's not even that cold. Like it never snows, but I need to be leaning into the winter. To hire this year because last year I wasn't going hard enough. So I will be picking up a few things from Macy's. If you need to get some stuff for fallcheckoutmacys.com, that's macys.com. You'll find what you need. I can guarantee you that. So let's start. When I first started getting acne, I first started getting acne later in middle school, so probably 7th or 8th grade, and it wasn't too bad. My acne was pretty much just the little bumps on my forehead with an occasional. Little cystic acne, but it was. Not all cystic. I didn't have cystic all over my face. It mainly showed up in my forehead. I had a lot of tiny bumps in my forehead. I also had a lot of blackheads too. My skin was just very dirty. I think that that was partially. My fault, because I did not have a skin routine at the time at all. I didn't take care of my skin at all, and I was also a cheerleader at the time, so I was wearing makeup and. I was sweating a lot because I was going to cheer practice like three to four times a week and I wasn't really cleaning my skin properly. So I think that that's kind of why that started. But I was also going through puberty. It was like the beginning stages of puberty for me and I kind of went through puberty a little bit late. So I found a lot of people were kind of going through puberty 5th, 6th grade, whereas it didn't really hit me until. Probably 8th grade, maybe 7th grade, but mainly 8th grade. Like I was a late bloomer. So I think the combination of not taking care of my skin, but also. Doing chair and sweating a lot and putting on a lot of makeup. Added to it. And it sucked for sure. Like I I hated it, but I also don't feel like I really. Was as self-conscious, maybe. I mean, I was definitely self-conscious in middle school, don't get me wrong. But for some reason, like. Acne didn't really start to bother me. Until I got a little bit older. And I don't know if it was because. A lot of kids had acne at the time. Like, I felt like a lot of kids in middle school had acne. So. I just didn't feel like it was that different, if that makes sense. But I don't remember. Like I don't fully remember how acne affected me emotionally in middle school, but I also know that. It wasn't that bad like it. It came in and out like it was like bad sometimes and not as bad others. And it was like rarely that I had a cystic acne, so it didn't feel like a huge issue at the time, but it definitely was there and I definitely was aware of it. And in retrospect, I know it was because I wasn't taking care of my skin. While going through like the biggest change of my body's life which is puberty in the beginning of puberty. Then I went to high school. And my skin started getting a lot worse and. Throughout high school I went through phases with my skin. Like sometimes I'd I'd be pretty good and my skin would be pretty clear, but then sometimes it would be really, really bad. And acne, for me was more the kind of tiny bumps rather than, like, large cystic acne. I had a lot of tiny bumps all over my face, which some people call fungal acne, but I don't know if that's what I really had. I would also get like cystic zits. Like the deep rooted zits. It just started to build up and get worse and. I was definitely going through puberty during this time because, again, I was a late bloomer. I, like, didn't really go through puberty until eighth grade, freshman year, sophomore year. Like, I I feel like I'm still going through puberty sometimes and I'm 19 because I'm just a ******* late bloomer. I literally. Had a completely flat chest. I had no *****. My period didn't even come until I was 16. I I felt very self-conscious about that. For sure, which is kind of off topic but. It kind of relates because, you know, getting acne. After going through puberty. Or while going through puberty is very common and so I feel like it's relevant to talk about the other parts of my body at the time too. I just was very underdeveloped. But that will also was kind of confusing to me because I'm like, why am I? Getting acne but I'm not getting *****. Like, what the ****? I was like everybody else. All my other friends got acne. And ***** in there. But for me it was like, Oh no, you're just getting acne. No ***** no. Have fun. So that was kind of 8th grade freshman year for me. I remember sophomore year, my acne got pretty bad. But the problem was is that. I wasn't really doing anything to fix it like throughout high school, like. I would try little products here and there and my mom would try to like buy me different things, but nothing like really worked. But I feel like I was too lazy to really put effort in to trying to. Relieve it like I didn't put. The effort in to to try new products and stuff like that. Like my mom was buying the stuff and she was making me try it, but nothing was really working so I just got discouraged and then would stop. And I think I was definitely self-conscious of my acne in high school, but I really started to wear makeup and cover it up and. I also went to all girls school where, you know, we all kind of just let our hair down, if you will, and nobody shaved their legs. People would forget to wear deodorant, you know? Nobody would wash their hair for the whole week like we weren't. We weren't like. We were all comfortable with one another because we were. All girls. And we just understood, like, OK, you know, we don't need to shave our armpits every day to be around each other like we all know. That we're all just girls and this is what we deal with, you know what I mean? There is this unspoken understanding when going to an all girls school that we all know. We're not perfect. But when you go to a school with boys, sometimes there's this added pressure to be, you know? Super put together in a way because you want to impress the boys and. I think out of school with all girls that that wasn't there, which was kind of nice. So I definitely think that helped with having acne because I I. No girls were wearing makeup at school. Like, we were all wearing no makeup. You could see everybody's acne, you could see everybody's leg hair. If they forgot to shave their legs, like it was all out in the open. So I think that was actually not a terrible thing also. If, like, we were going to a football game after school, yeah, we'd all put on makeup and cute outfits and we'd all shave our legs and do whatever. But there is like. A time for all of us to just let loose and that was at school. Now don't get me wrong, I hated all girls school, but that was one good part about it. So I think that that made me like. Feel less like **** about my acne and to be honest, I don't really remember my acne affecting me until I left school. And that was in junior year and I still did definitely have acne when I left school. And that was also around the time that I started my YouTube channel and I wasn't wearing makeup on YouTube and everybody was seeing my acne and a lot of people were like, Oh my God. I can't believe you're not wearing makeup and covering that up, like, wow, that's so brave. And I was like, oh, am I being brave right now? Cool, so. You know, I started just not wearing makeup in my videos and. I never wore makeup in my videos really again after that point because I was like, wow, people really, you know, can relate to me even more when they can see my acne and I'm not covering it up and stuff. And that was kind of empowering. So although acne wasn't my favorite part of my face, the fact that people connected with me even more when I showed, it was like, oh, wait, that's great, I love that. So again, acne still wasn't really bothering me. It it definitely wasn't. Something that I enjoyed, but it also was like. Kind of a positive thing because I was like, OK, well I can't really control this. I have acne. What am I gonna do? I'm just going to show it. People are gonna connect with me over it and. That's it, and it still didn't really bother me. So after I left school, I lived at home for a while. And I was working from home. And I was making videos from home and I was very lonely. And. I didn't really have many friends, if any. And. I basically made YouTube videos all day, every day and I got very depressed because I was very lonely and I was just like working on this every single day, every single day and I got really depressed and I think that that definitely affected my skin. I do notice that when I'm not in a good place mentally, my skin gets worse and I think that. Living at home and just grinding on these videos every single day made me depressed, made me anxious and that definitely made my skin a lot worse. But again. I just kind of. Went with it. And I think that my skin at that time was the least of my priorities, right? Because. I was dealing with severe mental health issues. I mean, I was struggling with very bad depression. And so, like, my skin was like the least of my worries. I was like, I just wanna. Be excited about tomorrow and I don't care if my ******* skin looks like **** you know what I'm saying? I don't care because there's a bigger picture here. I'm struggling with much bigger issues. But my skin did get a little bit worse. And then. I started to make some YouTube friends and I started to meet those YouTube friends and then I started to consider moving to LA and I don't know if it was a coincidence, but I do. Think it might be a little bit connected. My life started to get a little bit more exciting. I started to be a little bit more social. And things started to kind of look up for me, mental health wise, because I had something to look forward to, right? And so then my depression kind of lessened and my anxiety kind of lessened and I became a lot happier and my skin started clearing up and then by the time I moved to LA. A few months later, my skin was like perfect. And I was doing nothing. I was trying little products here and there, but like when I really think about it, I wasn't really doing anything. I know I tried out. Some custom skin care websites that I was obsessed with at the time and they're actually so great brands. I think I was using curology at the time. And I wasn't doing a lot. I literally washed my face with. Cleanser and then like use curology and then that was it. And that really worked for me at the time. And it was basically just like a quiz. You type in all your skin info. And then they send you one moisturizer that has all of the stuff in it. That your skin may need and then you just put that on before bed and then you're good. And I think that that's what I was using at that time. And I don't know if it was the stress that made my acne go away or if it was the curology. I don't know, I'll never know. Or if it was even just a shift in my hormones. Like, again, you'll never know. But. My acne was pretty much gone when I moved to LA and it was the summer time and I was getting tan and getting some vitamin D and my skin looked great and so. That was super exciting. And. I just got comfortable having good skin. I was like, oh, OK, I guess I'm done because, you know, I guess puberty is over. This is how my skin is gonna be from now on. Yay. Well, I was wrong. OK, so if I were to host a live radio show and I could play any music I wanted, I would honestly probably have the time of my Life OK, but I'll admit I would probably end up playing. Just sad music. I don't know what it is about me, but I love sad music, OK? And so I'd probably end up playing. A lot of sad music. Specifically for the people who are listening in the car by themselves. That want to shed a tear in a good way? Well now there is a place that I or you or anyone can host a live show. Amp is the platform that allows people to come together and create live, unfiltered radio shows with whatever music or content that they love. And this is like a real show where you can have people listening live and you can pick exactly which songs to play, and you can even have fans calling in to chat while you're on air. If I had a live show, I would definitely. Have people call in and ask me for dating advice honestly, so I think I'd have to do dating advice. You know what this actually sounds like the perfect radio show. Sad music combined with dating advice, because all of the shows on AMP are run by real people. You can tell that the playlists are authentic. A playlist generated automatically just sounds different than one that an individual is controlling based on their passions and tastes. And with 10s of millions of licensed songs to choose from, everyone will find the music that appeals to them. But it's not just music. You can have a talk show, or react to news, or riff on pop culture, and that's one of the best parts about being a podcast host. You can just riff. On whatever. Excites your mind on any given day. So download AMP today in the App Store that's a amp. Or ask Alexa to play AMP after that summer. My skin started. Looking like **** again. I mean, not like having acne is looking like **** but it was more than that guys. It was like I stopped using products. I wasn't washing my face routinely, really. I wasn't eating. Foods that were good for my body, I. Wasn't sleeping. At all. Like, I literally would sleep like ******* five hours a night and I'd go to bed at like 5 in the morning and wake up at like noon. It was like so bad. My like life habits were bad. I wasn't taking care of myself at all. My skin totally went down the drain. All of my progress had went down the drain I wasn't really using. I wasn't using Curology anymore, I wasn't using anything, and I would use an occasional. Serum or occasional face wash, but I had absolutely no skin knowledge at all. So. I just was putting random **** on my face and being like, oh, maybe this will work and I'd try it for like a week and if it didn't work I'd just stop using it altogether and so my skin just started breaking out again. I also looked lifeless in my face, like my face skin was super pale and my dark circles under my eyes were bad and it was just like bad. And. I started getting bacne which I had bacne in school too, but it started getting really bad. The winter after I moved to LA, I feel like that's just when everything kind of went wrong. And I had people around me that were really toxic too at that time, and it was just really hard. And so I. I was breaking out for sure. But again like. I think because my mental health had dropped to a point that wasn't so good. I just didn't have the motivation to fix it or to work on it. And now that I'm really reflecting on my acne journey, I realized that in my deepest and darkest moments of depression, that is when my acne was the worst. And I don't know if it's because when I tend to get really depressed, I tend to not care, take care of myself. I don't know if it's that or if it's the fact that stress has a really huge impact on your body and can cause things like acne, you know, according to some things that I've read online. I don't know how true it all is, but. I don't know what it was, but I found that in times of really deep depression I would break out. So after that winter ended I. Started to feel like, OK, I need to take. Control of this situation. My main motivation for wanting to clear up my skin was because Coachella was coming. Yes, my life revolves around Coachella. Shut up, I know. I had all this acne on my back. I had all this acne on my face and I was like, I want to wear. Cute outfits that show a lot of skin. But a lot of my skin has acne on it and I'm self-conscious of it. I'm gonna try to get rid of it before Coachella comes, so I started getting these facials. To try and help reduce my acne. That kind of worked, but the facials were so ******* expensive and they were painful and I just don't feel like they were really working. Enough to justify the price. So I kind of stopped doing that. Then I went to this super expensive skin care store. In LA and I was like, guys, this is what my skin looks like, recommend me some products. So they sold me probably $500 worth of skin care products. I didn't know. They basically made a skin care routine for me and I spent 500 ******* dollars on these products because I was like, listen, I'm so desperate. I'll just take anything. I'll do anything to get rid of this acne before Coachella. Please God, just help me and I started using these really expensive products and I don't think that they were right for me. I remember I was using a really abrasive exfoliator on my face multiple times a week, which probably was making my acne worse. And then. The rest of the products were good I think from what I can remember, but I think. A lot of them were overpriced and and maybe a little too harsh for my clearly sensitive skin, but I just didn't know any better. And I was just using them because I was just trying to get rid of this ******* acne. Coachella rolls around, my skin is not really getting much better. All of the facials, all of $500.00 ******* products, none of it really helped. And I was definitely disappointed. But I was like, you know what? **** it, I'm just gonna put makeup on my face, makeup on my acne on my back, and call it a day. And I did. And I had a great Coachella. I guess it was kind of ****** but it was good. And then after that I was like, OK, we really need to. Figure this out because this is controlling my life now. Like I'm spending a lot of money on this. It's starting to affect. Myself esteem. Like I really want to get this under control, so I go to the dermatologist and. We try some topical treatments. I don't even remember the names of them. That wasn't working. Next step was like, OK, let's start taking medications. So the first medication I went on was called spironolactone. And this is basically a medication that helps like regulate your hormones so that you get less acne because a lot of acne comes from hormones, which I think a lot of people don't necessarily know, but. A lot of people. Have the most perfect skin care routine on the planet, but still have acne because their acne is hormonal, so it's something that's out of their control. No matter what products you put on your face, that's not going to affect the fact that your hormones are on the inside and you know. They're gonna do what they want. So if they want to give you acne, they're going to give you acne no matter. You know how many? Beautiful, clean products you put on your face and I think that that's kind of what was going on with me, to be honest, cause I clearly had something wrong with my hormones. Or off with my hormones, considering I got my period so late and I went through puberty so late like. I wouldn't be surprised if it had to do with my hormones and we never really. Pinpointed what it was like, where my, why my acne was happening, whether it was. Hormones, or it was just genetics, like we never figured that out, but it doesn't really matter. The moral of the story was I had acne, that no product to fix, not any facial, not any $500.00 product. So spironolactone was the next option. It was meant to control my hormones. I went on it. I didn't have a good reaction with it. It made. My face extremely puffy and. I remember my mom even noticed she was like, Emma. Your face looks so swollen all the time, and I was like, I know, and we couldn't figure out what it was. And I to this day, I mean, we'll never know for sure, but I think it was from the spironolactone. My face was so swollen and it almost would look droopy sometimes because it was so swollen and my acne was not getting any better. If anything, it was only getting worse. And I was extremely discouraged. And so this was when **** started to get really hard for me because not only did I have all this acne, but now my face. Is swollen. 30% more than normal. And that's when I really started to get self-conscious because I'm in front of a camera all the time I am. Taking photos of myself constantly and I started to not want to be on camera at all. I started to feel super unattractive in a way because my face was so swollen. And like my cheeks were like puffing out. Yet and and I'm somebody that this is a little little trigger warning I'm going to talk about. My relationship with food for a second here. So feel free to skip ahead if that triggers you. But I've struggled with body image issues. I struggle with body dysmorphia. I've struggled throughout my life with various eating disorders. And. My face looked like I was gaining weight. Which, you know, not that there's anything wrong with that, but from my, you know, slightly disordered brain. I was like. I'm gaining weight because my face is is enlarging. When I would look at my body, the rest of my body looked. How I would expect it to look based on my, you know behaviors right? Like I am somebody that. I was eating really well and I was working out every day and so it didn't make sense to me why. My face. Was like gaining weight, but the rest of my body wasn't. But then that started to affect my body dysmorphia, and I started to. Get my relationship with food declined. A lot. From. This experience of this extreme facial swelling and my mom and I decided we need to stop the spironolactone. We both assumed that it was from the spironolactone and based on. What ended up happening? I think it was because I stopped taking spironolactone and my face. Swelling reduced a lot, which was great. But my God, that was a really tough time for me and I remember, you know, when I was dealing with this facial swelling like. Like people were. Really harsh on me and my appearance for sure. Because I just looked different, I didn't look the same and so people were. You know, kind of would say mean things. Just say, like, God, Emma looks like **** you know? And I knew I looked like ****. And I felt like **** and. Everybody you know, was like, Emma's content sucks now because my videos were suffering as well because I was dealing with this. Extreme level of self consciousness and I just didn't even want to be on camera. I had no video ideas. I. Didn't want to take Instagram photos. I didn't want to film a Snapchat story. Like I didn't want to be in front of a camera at all because I felt so. Bad about myself. It was like. Not only is my face swollen half its like double its normal size but also I have acne on top of it and it I look like a bobble head in a way it was so bizarre and. Of course I didn't want to make content. Of course I didn't want to ******* be on camera. I remember. I. Would go to events and get photos taken of me and I would look at the photos in my face. Just looked so massive and I I would feel. Like I just wanted to hide. For the rest of my life, it was just so terrible. And also, you know, on top of that, my acne. So it was like, not only was I having this facial swelling, but I also had this acne. And so it was just, I felt so bad about how my face looked, yet my face is like my career. And it was so confusing for me. And. So uninspiring, and I definitely like. You know my content suffered. For sure. So let me tell you about the moment that. Things, kind of. Changed for me and I decided that I needed to take a more extreme approach, like the spironolactone wasn't working. Nothing was working. I decided I needed to take it to the next level and like figure something else out. I flew to New York for an event and I was only going to be in New York for like 3 days and. I remember I landed the plane and I opened up my phone camera and I looked at my face in the phone camera and my acne was so inflamed from being on the plane that I I. Don't think my acne had ever looked worse. I actually think that. This exact moment when the plane landed in New York was the probably the most severe my acne has ever looked in. My life. I didn't even take a photo of it. Because I felt so awful about how it looked that it never hit the Internet. So, but mind you, I had an event the next day. That I had to be. Ready for I had to get my photos taken. All of that stuff and my acne had never looked worse in my life. Not to mention I still had a decent amount of facial swelling. Leftover from the spironolactone. Because that stuff stays in your system for a while. I think I had already stopped taking it, but. My facial swelling was still there. It took months for it to fully go down. And. I get to my hotel room and I call my team and I'm like freaking out. I'm like crying. I'm like, I can't do this tomorrow. I look so bad. Like, what are we supposed to do? What are we going to do? And somebody from my team makes me an appointment with a facialist. Slash dermatologist. I think she's actually just a dermatologist, but she does facials too anyway. So I go to this dermatologist slash facialist. And. She's basically going to do a treatment that will help. Reduce redness and inflammation. For my shoot the next day. And I sit down. And I'm clearly upset and she can see that. And. She was like. Are you OK? And I was like, no, like, no, I'm not. I'm not OK. And she was like, why? And I was like, because I have to be on camera every single day. I have to. Be on the Internet. People have to see me every single day because of my job, and I can barely look at myself in the ******* mirror because I my face is swollen and I have so much. I've more acne than I've ever had in my entire life, yet the whole world has to see me. I can't just hide in these moments. I I can't even take a second to reflect. During these moments, like I have to keep going. And I don't wanna, I don't want people to see me right now. I've always been so chill about people seeing my acne. I've always been so chill about the world. Knowing that, you know, this is something that I deal with, but I can't do it right now. I'm too weak right now. I don't want people to see my acne right now. I don't want to have acne anymore. I've been tough. I've been brave this whole time. **** it, great. But I'm. I'm the *******. It's over. Like I this has gotten to me now. I don't like to look at myself in the mirror. I don't like to see photos of myself. It haunts me. I just want to hide in my ******* room and I never want to leave again. I never, ever want to look in a mirror again. And, you know, it was a combination of the fact that this, you know, spironolactone made my face so swollen. That I look like a fully different person on top of the fact that my acne is worse than it's ever been in my entire life. So it was a combination of both of those things that just made me it pushed me over the edge. The swollen face was almost worse than the acne but. The acne was. A huge part of it as well. And I think the acne was also adding to my facial swelling though, too, because, you know, acne is inflamed and it gets swollen. So it was like I had this facial swelling and then on top of it I had acne to make my face even more swollen. I was losing my mind. I was like, listen, I I know that. What you look like on the outside doesn't matter. I know that it's about what's on the inside, and I ******* know that deep down. That's why people like me. That's why people care about me. People don't care about what I look like. Who gives a ****? But. I cracked. And that's ******* human, and that's normal. And that's. Expected it's like. I looked so different than what I was used to, and it was so upsetting for me. And so anyway, I explained all this to this facialist dermatologist lady in New York, and I start bawling my eyes out. I'm crying. I'm like. ******* hyperventilating. I had not really talked about this a lot before because I think that I had always wanted to be tough and I always wanted to seem tough when it came to acne because people knew. Me for that. They knew me for being open about my acne and accepting it, and so I felt like a fraud for cracking like that. And she was like, we need to get you on Accutane and I was like, I will do anything. But the complicated thing about Accutane is that you can't just like, go to your dermatologist and say, hey, can we go on Accutane? It has to be approved by your dermatologist. You have to try X amount of medications before you try Accutane you have to apply online to do Accutane. It's like this whole process that can even take months to start and so. I immediately texted my mom and I was like, we need to find me a dermatologist in LA that can get me Accutane like I'm done. Like, I can't do this anymore, like. We just need to. ******* do this like I have to be on camera. Every day? Like why am I not working a little bit harder to try and make this situation? More comfortable for me. You know what I mean. Like, why have I not taken Accutane yet when I've literally tried everything, my acne is worse than ever. And I actually like, you know. This is actually something that would be helpful for you know what I love, which is YouTube. I just want to be able to be on camera and not ******* shudder at my own face. Like, because I've just. I'm done. I'm done with all this stupid ****. Like, let's just *******. Go to the extreme and take Accutane. I don't care. So I text my mom. She finds me a dermatologist. Meanwhile, while I'm in New York, I get this facial done. It helps a tiny bit, but whatever. I go to this event, I am extremely self-conscious. The photos come out from the event I. Wanted to puke when I saw them. This is all honesty. I'm just being honest here. And when I get home. I start going to the dermatologist and start figuring out, OK, when can we start Accutane. Etcetera, etcetera. Mind you, I had stopped taking spironolactone, but my face was still extremely swollen. For some reason. And I was just like. Get me on this **** as quick as possible. Clothes are one of the many ways that we express ourselves and we're constantly switching up our wardrobes. To reflect our interests and styles. But one thing that is a little bit more difficult to switch up is our glasses. Until now, because now with pair eyewear. You can have a different frame every day, OK? With pair eyewear, you start with a chic pair of glasses, right? That look great just by themselves, but they have a special secret. Which is that they have at little. Magnet inside so you can snap on. A cool frame on top of your existing glasses. I got the crystal clear Reese base frame which is just a really chic pair of all clear glasses. The frame is clear obviously the lenses are clear and I got a tortoise frame and a Plaid frame so I can now it. Basically I have 3 pairs of reading glasses now. There are so many options, iconic base shapes and then all sort of frames to go on top retro classic neon sparkle. You'll definitely find your vibe I also love. Buying from a brand that really, really cares and pair provides glasses to a child in need for every pair that you buy. Get glasses as ever, changing as you are with pear. Go to pair eyewear com Emma for 15% off your first purchase. That's 15% off at PAIR eyewear.com/emmaso. I start. December of 2019. And. Honestly, here's basically how Accutane works. You take it for like 7 months, six months, seven months. I took it for seven. And basically the idea behind it is that it will it like reduces some sort of gland in your face that produces sebum. So it doesn't produce sebum anymore, so then you can't your body doesn't produce acne as much anymore. That's my understanding of the medication. I don't really get it. I'm not a scientist, but that's pretty much what I. Get from it. It basically like dries out those glands in your face, but you have to take it for anywhere from you know. Three to sometimes 12 months. I don't know. Some people are on it really long time. I was only on it for. It really just depends on the person. I don't know. I don't know the length of Accutane. For me it was seven months, so we'll just talk about me here. And listen, it wasn't easy. Like, it was definitely hard, because, similar to spironolactone, guess what else made my face puffy? Accutane for the first few months of Accutane my face. Was very puffy. And dry and chapped and I would get like really weird hot flashes. And my face would get super red for no reason. And my skin was super sensitive and I felt tired a lot. Meanwhile is the beginning of quarantine. When I was on Accutane. And. It was definitely not the most pleasant time. I mean, don't get me wrong, but. I feel like the seven months went by extremely fast, like I just distracted myself by playing Fortnite. Putting a bunch of chapstick on every 20 minutes. Eating as healthy as I possibly could to try to, like, you know, support my body through this tough time. And. Just. Be open to the process. Accutane takes a huge toll on your body. You know, there's a lot of side effects. It can affect your mental health. It can. Affect like it can make your joints and your back hurt, it can make you feel fatigued, it can. The main thing that it does is it makes you dry the **** out like you just get so dry. So chapped, so dry. And a lot of that happened to me, but it was like one of those things where I was like, I'm so desperate. To just. Help my skin that I don't even care. So I was very tough through the whole process because I was like, I know. That my life is gonna be better on the other side of this. And it had gotten to a point where my life was at such a I was at such a low point with myself esteem and with my acne and with my facial swelling problems and all that that I was like. There's no way that I'm going to end up at a worse place after Accutane like, I've already hit rock bottom with this ****. There's only going up from here, so. I just rode the wave and I honestly tried not to pay too much of mind to the side effects of taking Accutane, and I think that helped too. I just distracted myself. I literally played Fortnite for 8 hours a day for three months in the beginning of quarantine and during my Accutane process, just to like kill time. Guess what? No regrets. No regrets. Because it ******* flew on by. Next thing I know, I'm done with Accutane. During the summer it was during summer 2020. And my skin was. Perfect. I mean, it was ******* perfect. I've never seen it that perfect. It had never been that perfect, even it it was perfect and I had a little bit of scarring, you know, here and there. But. My skin looked amazing and I finally felt like, oh ****. It was all worth it. All the trial and error, all of the. Weird **** that I tried all these years. It was worth it. Because it led me to taking Accutane. In finally having the skin that I dreamed of. And. It was amazing. And still, to this day, my skin has remained pretty clear. I I've struggled with occasional breakouts like here and there, but nothing, you know, remotely. Like? What I was dealing with before I went on Accutane. My facial swelling is completely gone now. I mean, I still have facial swelling like every other person, but not like it was like clearly like a a reaction to something. Medically, like it was clearly like I was allergic to the medicine or something. Like there was clearly something wrong there. There was. It was not like a normal. Puffy face, it was like. Worse. But my skin has remained. Pretty good. Ever since I've taken Accutane and. I've been off Accutane for almost a year now. Probably like 8 months. And my skin has held up really well and. I think the reason why it's held up really well is because I've really gotten into skin care and really gotten into learning how to. Take care of my skin. I've tried hundreds of products since I got off Accutane I there's a **** ton of products that I love from bazillions of different brands. Like I I am super open minded when it comes to skin care, so I've been having a lot of fun just like trying stuff that piques my interest at. Ulta, Sephora. Wherever the ****. And just trying a bunch of new things. And. Now that my skin is not. Super irritated and. All of that from whatever it may have been. Hormones, whatever. I can actually have more fun trying new products because. Before, like my acne was not curable by a topical product, no matter what topical product I would put on my skin. It would enflame it. It didn't matter. I could literally put on. ******* the most simple. Moisturizer and my skin would react. Whereas now, like my skin is. So much more resilient so that I can try so many more things. And that's been really great. And I mean still to this day, my skin, I will break out if I use the wrong product still to this day. But it's not the same. It'll be like 2 pimples, whereas it used to be 50 and. Moral of the story is. Accutane cured my acne 1000% Accutane cured my acne the seven months of dryness and back pain and. Weird hot flashes was all worth it. It really was the thing that cured my acne. I'm never gonna say. Ohh, this product cured my acne. This product did this. This product did that because that's not what happened. The only thing that was able to fully get rid of my acne was taking Accutane for seven months. Umm. But now I focus on skin maintenance, right? Because it's like, OK, I worked so hard. I I spent so much time getting my skin to this place, I'm going to take the best care of it I possibly can. And so I started watching Hirams YouTube videos. I started doing research on my own, you know, reading different skin care opinions because there's so many different opinions. Like, for example, there's controversial topics like essential oils. Some people will be like, essential oils are terrible. Other people will be like essential oils are extremely beneficial, but only if they're used in this. Concentration and all that. And I've just been like very interested in that. Some people are like, fragrance is the devil. Some people are like, fragrance is not actually that bad, depending on what type of fragrance it is. Like. There's so many different opinions out there, right? So I've spent a lot of time looking into that, figuring out what my own skin care philosophy is and then. Above all that, just trying stuff myself, seeing what agrees with my skin to build my arsenal of products that I love and. Maintaining my skin has become a huge priority for me because I feel like I never really took care of my skin before because nothing ever worked or agreed with me. So it was just discouraging and I would just stop. But now that I have a little bit more room to explore new products, I've been having so much fun. Seeing what's out there, there's bazillions of products out there. Why not? Try them all. So I've been having a lot of fun with that. But I think a lot of people sometimes are like Emma. How can you be so into skin care? When you were on Accutane for seven months and that cured your acne like you're lying. Well, that's not how it works. Accutane cured my acne, but skin care and taking care of your skin is a totally different story. I still break out here and there. And I still have products that I use when I'm breaking out because they help. Even though my breakouts may be small, they're still there. And then when it comes to day-to-day skin maintenance like. Moisturizing your skin every day, exfoliating your skin a few times a week, stuff like that. No matter if you have acne or not, that benefits your skin. You see what I'm saying? So skin care isn't just for people who have acne. Skin care isn't just for curing acne. It's also for. Keeping your skin, which is an organ healthy, you know. So anyway, that's my acne journey. It's been a long one and it's been very emotional. But. I'm here. And I made it through. And for all of you who are on your own acne journey right now, I'm praying for you. I know how hard it is, and I know the type of. Toll it takes on your body and your mind and all of that, but just know that. It will pass. It will pass and also. It has nothing to do with who you are. I know it's so easy to. Tie your worth to your appearance. I do it to this day. But. That's not reality. You are so much more than. Your acne then. Anything about your appearance? You're so much more than that. And as hard as it is to believe that when you're feeling down in the dumps about your skin. Trust me. You're much more. Than anything about your appearance and on that note. I'm going to answer some questions. First question, somebody said. Does it get worse before it gets better? Yes. That was definitely my experience. Like when I first started on Accutane, my skin purged a lot and I broke out pretty bad. But. I think the reason why I didn't even mention that when I was telling the story was because I didn't even really care. At that point I was so desperate. For results that like me. That, like my skin purging, was like the least of my worries. I was like, long term. This is helping me and the dermatologist also warned me that my acne was going to get worse before it got better so. I was like ready for that, right? It definitely did get worse before it got better, but I was like mentally prepared for that and I knew that it was going to happen and I was ready for it. I was like, **** it, I can handle this. Let's do it. Somebody said if you never used Accutane, do you think you would have gotten rid of your acne? I don't. I think I may have grown out of it eventually, but I think that the great thing about Accutane was that not only did it. Pretty much stop it altogether. At least for now. I mean, it could always come back. I might have to go on Accutane again at some point, but. It definitely stopped it for the past year anyway. Completely. And I don't think that I would have been able to get it under control. Otherwise, because I think it was. A deeper issue, I think it's genetic, I think it was hormonal and I think that those are things that are really hard to control and so. No topical product could help me with that. I think Accutane was my solution. And I also am glad that I went on it when I did because. The thing is. If you go on Accutane. The sooner you go on Accutane. The better, at least in my scenario, because Accutane was something that my doctor approved for me. You know, it's not for everybody, but because the doctor approved it for me, it's good that I went on it sooner rather than later because. It prevented a lot of scarring as well because. The longer you know you have acne, the more scars that you may get and stuff like that. And because I kind of. Went on it as my acne was starting to get really cystic and bad. I kind of. Bit the bullet there a little bit and so. That was also a pro of of going on it sooner rather than later. But again, I mean I still have some acne scars and. I am *******. I honestly, I'm kind of call me crazy. But I'm kind of proud of them. And I know a lot of people are really self-conscious of acne scars, and acne scars can be really, really. You know all. Uh, they some can be really bad, some are like, not as bad. Whatever. Some people like it. It's very different for everybody. But I think acne scars are something to be proud of. It's almost like, yeah, I ******* went through that. And acne is one of the hardest things to deal with ever, because it's right on your face and it it's really hard to not stare at yourself. And so. It's almost like, yeah, I did that. Like, I have acne scars, but I'm done now. I don't have acne anymore. I I got through it and these are my. Badges of honor. Like I, I genuinely, I don't ever look at an acne scar and be like you because I'm like. Emma, you had to go through hell. You know what I mean? Like that that is like your ******* trophy for getting through it in a weird way. Somebody said how did you really feel when people would comment about your skin? I think it definitely used to bum me out a little bit because, you know, I was like, come on guys, like, let's. Let's. Be realistic here, like so many teens have acne. Like, probably *******. I I don't want to say a percentage because then I'll say an incorrect percentage and then everybody will get mad at me. But a large percentage of teens have acne. And I was like. Really? We're going to hate on me for this. Like, we could definitely hate on me for something a little bit more valid, at least. So it just kind of felt like a low blow. And it was just kind of a bummer because I'm like, wow, is that really all people seeing me is the fact that I have acne? Like, come on. But then I also understand how the Internet works and that people are ruthless. And so I'm. I'm pretty good at, like, turning off those feelings. And I'd much rather somebody say, oh, your acne is ugly, then say you're really annoying. Like, I I feel like that's a worse hate comment for me. Or like. Somebody telling me to, like, die, like, that's worse. So I feel like getting comments about acne, yeah, was a bummer, but it's also, like, the least insulting out of all of the hate comments I get. So. Not too bad. A lot of people are asking me how to feel confident with acne and unfortunately like I don't have an answer right because when my acne was. Not as bad. And I was in school and I went to all girls school and there was not a lot of pressure. And I was getting a lot of support and love on the Internet for showing my acne like. It was easy for me to be maybe more confident about it because I had so much support from you guys, even from day one, and also like it was so not a big deal at my school, like nobody cared about their appearance at my school. So it was like there was just so much less pressure, right, because of my environment, whereas like when I started to. Be on the Internet and people were able to make comments about it and I started to grow on the Internet and so I had more haters and stuff like that. I never really found a way to be confident with my acne. I think that I had like, I it wasn't that I was OK. I guess I was unapologetic about it, but I wouldn't say I was necessarily confident. Like I wasn't afraid to show my acne on camera. But that doesn't necessarily mean that I was confident about it. It just meant that I was on unapologetic about it. I was like, this is me. Like, take it or leave it. I'm not even necessarily the most. Accepting of myself, but like. Here it is. You know what I mean. Take it or leave it. I wouldn't say I was necessarily super confident in my acne. Like, I definitely like. It definitely bummed me out for sure. Once I lived in LA and I was making videos and stuff like that. It definitely bummed me out and I wasn't super confident. But I would say my advice to my past self would be. Acne is so ******* normal, almost everybody struggles with it at least once in their life. It has nothing to do with your level of attractiveness. You know what I'm saying? Like? I was thinking about it like this too. Think about right now. Your best friend, or your boyfriend, or your girlfriend, or your significant other, whoever. Think about somebody that you love very unconditionally. Would you love them any less if they woke up tomorrow and they had acne all over their face? No. You wouldn't. Like I think about the people closest to me in my life. Like. And if they woke up tomorrow and they had a full face of acne? I would not think of them any differently. I would still be equally as attracted to them if it's my significant other or if it's my best friend. I mean, I'm not really, you usually aren't necessarily like attracted to your best friend, but like, you know, I'm saying, like, I wouldn't think of them any differently. I wouldn't love them any less. If it was a significant other, I wouldn't be attracted to them any less. Because there's so much more to being attracted to somebody and loving somebody than you know. Whether or not they've ******* acne, right? There's a bigger picture here. And I think it's so hard to remember that when you're in it, right? Because you're like, God, I just want this to go away. Because it it makes makeup look weird. You know, it makes it's uncomfortable. You know, some people think it's gross and and a lot of people think that if you have acne, it means that you don't have good hygiene. And that's like a huge stereotype. That's completely false, right. But, you know, having acne might make somebody think that you're dirty. I know that that was an experience I had where a lot of people on the Internet were. They were like, this girl is so dirty. And gross, like she has so much acne. Like it's probably she's never washed her face before, when in reality it was like, no, I I had good hygiene. I decent enough ******* hygiene. Shut the hell up, you know? But. There's a lot of really weird stereotypes and stigmas around acne that. Will make you feel less attractive if you have it, and all of it is not true. At the end of the day, who you are and what type of person you are that carries you farther than anything else and whether or not you have acne. Is just. Irrelevant, really. But it's so hard to see that when you're in the moment, right? And I get that, but it's just reminding yourself there's such a bigger picture. The people in my life love me for me, not because of what my skin looks like or what it doesn't look like. Somebody said what are some lifestyle acne tips? OK, I have a lot of these like tips for. Just things you can do in your day-to-day life that help right? Number one, I know this is annoying and I know I remember when I had really bad acne and people would tell me to drink more water. I would punch them in the face. But drinking more water does help. I'm somebody that doesn't drink a lot of water. I drink a lot of caffeine and that's it. And I find that when I'm. Not drinking enough water even after Accutane. My skin I will break out still, and my skin just doesn't look as good too. It doesn't look as glowy. So as annoying as it is drinking more water, I know I I'm. I used to want to punch people in the face that would say that. And still to this day I do. But cause I I think The thing is people think that like drinking water will cure acne. No, it probably won't, but it helps. A little bit and. When you're struggling with acne, you might as well do everything you can. To help it, right? Another thing is I stay away from dairy. And I know a lot of people. Agree with me that dairy. Makes acne worse. And I don't know why that is, but if I eat like a cup of ice cream or like drink milk or something like, I mean, I'm going to be. Not only is my bowels gonna be hurting, but also I definitely will pop a little pimple up. I I find that like cheese because it has less lactose in it I think. Is that right? Is it less lactose? I don't remember it has less. Lactose. Siri, Google does cheese have less lactose than milk? Yeah, OK. So. If you want to eat dairy, sticking to foods that have less lactose in it, for example. Parmesan cheese that doesn't have a lot of lactose in it cause it's a hard cheese. Like hard cheeses have less lactose. I don't really have issues with those. I don't feel like those make me break out. But if I'm like eating ice cream that has dairy in it, like I'm ****** if I'm drinking milk. I mean God, I never really drank milk in my whole life, but like. When I would have sleepovers with my friends and stuff like that. Like, we would have milk and cereal in the morning and that **** did not help. I have a cousin who had really bad cystic acne and she cut out dairy and that really helped her. So I don't know, I think cutting out dairy can really help. Another thing is washing your face and back immediately after working out. I used to workout. I'd go to soul cycle and then I'd just like. Go get coffee and then I'd like, you know, go get lunch. And then I'd come home and shower and that had this bacteria sitting on my skin for so many hours that that would make my breakouts much worse, especially on my back. Another tip is honestly guys is another annoying tip but. Eating a lot of fruits and veggies. I know it's ******* annoying, but I diet has a huge impact on your skin too, I've found. At least for me personally and so. Adding more veggies into my diet I I didn't really eat a lot of vegetables up until this year to be honest, like I would, but it was like not. Something I ate every day. Now I make sure that I eat vegetables every day. And that has really helped. With my skin, I mean, and my overall health too. But like, cause, you know, it's all the vitamins and stuff like that really helps. You're better off eating like a bowl of kale than taking a ******* Sugar Bear hair vitamin, right? So. That's another thing that has helped me. That's all I can really think of right now. Somebody said, would you recommend covering your acne with makeup? I would say be really careful about what makeup you use because makeup can really make it worse. I avoided wearing makeup as much as possible when I had really bad acne cause I would just. Immediately see how much more inflamed it would become after I'd take my makeup off? So I would say my advice on that would be avoid makeup at all costs but ask. But I mean at the same time like. Obviously, there's gonna be times where you need to wear makeup. That's totally fine, but maybe. Find products that are cleaner. Like I really love the brand kosas because they have. Much cleaner ingredients, and personally their ingredients agree really well with my skin, so. Just finding products that are lighter and airier and maybe even have some. Skin care related benefits to them. Like you can find so many BB creams and stuff like that that. Have. Skin supporting products in it like they might have moisturize. It might be like moisturizing or it might have certain. You know, ingredients that actually can help fight acne while you're wearing your makeup. So try to find those products, because that's a lifesaver. Somebody said did you ever lose hope 1000%? I lost hope. Bazillions of times, I mean. You know, especially after going on spironolactone, I was super down in the dumps because I was like, this actually made my acne worse and caused facial swelling. So now I have doubled the problems, right? And it's hard, but it's all trial and error and. You know, you may be able to find a solution to your acne that isn't Accutane. It might be like something else. Who knows, it might even be a simple change to your diet. It might be. You know, uh, slightly less harsh. It might be spironolactone. You know what I'm saying? Like, who knows? And for some people, Accutane doesn't work. It's so different for everybody and that's why it's easy to lose hope, because there's no solid answer. You just have to try everything for yourself, but I can assure you that. No matter who you are, you will ******* figure this out and you will get through it. Somebody said how to not care about people making comments about your skin. Listen, people making comments about other people's skin is the lowest blow possible. Like, really, you're gonna hate on somebody for something that's completely out of their control? Especially something so normal like acne. Like come on. Do better. That just shows how ****** of a person they are. If they're hating on you for your acne, that's like the lowest you could go. I mean, like, seriously, because it's like not only does everybody deal with it, but also it's so hard to deal with. I I can't imagine hating on somebody for their acne. That seems just like the most. Low blow you could do. Trust me. That says a lot more about them than it does about you. They are a ***** ** ****. And they're not even clever enough to come up with an actual good insult, because insulting somebody on acne is like. The dumbest **** ever. Like, at least insult them on like an ugly pair of shoes that they're like, really like, you could do better. You know what I mean? That's always my thing. I'm like, if you're hating on some somebody for something that they can't control, that just means you're not a creative enough hater. So work harder, haters. You know what I'm saying? Work harder, bullies. Acne is like you can do better. I'm kidding. Nobody should hate on anybody about literally anything, but you get what I'm saying? Somebody said what's something that has made your skin glow on your daily routine? Do you have any product recommendations for me? It is chemical exfoliants. These make my skin glow as ****. I have two that I really like. I really like the bad habit, total reboot H BHA chemical exfoliant and I really like the bliss clear genius serum exfoliant. Those are both great products that I've tried that I have used to exfoliate, and I really like both of them and they're great. Hiram has explained why chemical exfoliants are better than. In abrasive exfoliant. So I'll kind of explain the difference. Basically, the point of an exfoliant is to remove the dead skin from your face so that you kind of get a fresh start, you know what I'm saying? And a chemical exfoliant design, from my understanding, kind of dissolves the dead skin, whereas a more abrasive kind of exfoliant will like scrub it off. And the reason why a chemical one is better is because it's more gentle, because it's very easy to overdo it with a like super abrasive. Exfoliant, and that can actually be like kind of irritating to your skin, so using a chemical one is much better. And I do chemical exfoliants about twice a week and it just really keeps my skin like refreshed and glowing and it makes it keeps it feeling like clean because you know. It's hard to remove. All the dead skin and dirt from your face with just a face wash. So using an exfoliant like twice a week is my go to. And I love the bad habit one. I love the bliss one. I'm trying to think if I know any other ones that are good. That's all I can think of, but that has really helped me. Like, adding in a chemical exfoliant has been a game changer for my skin routine post Accutane because it just brings back the life into my face and, like, removes all that **** ****. So. Definitely would recommend those two, and those are and. Those are two brands that I've worked with, but I genuinely love those products. There's so many brands that make great products and so. It's hard to just choose one, but those are my faves. On that note. I think that I am going to end this episode, but I really hope that my story was understandable. Like, I swear to God, I like rambled on forever, but I hope that it made sense and I hope that you enjoyed it and I hope you learned something from it. And I hope you could relate to it in some way maybe, or could make you feel like you're not alone in some way, whatever it may be. I hope that it did that because that's always my goal and I love you so much and I appreciate you for listening and coming back every week if you like this episode and you like anything goes in general. Draw on Apple Podcasts and give us a little five stars. It really helps me out and it makes me feel good to see your guys's reviews. Also, subscribe on anywhere, any platform that you listen to podcasts. What else? Follow us on the Twitter at AG podcast so that you can interact. With. The podcast you can ask questions, be a part of our advice sessions, whatever it may be. And I think that's all I got. I love you guys have an amazing rest of your week and. I'm manifesting healthy and happy skin for all of us, because we all deserve it. And. Peace out, *******. Love you guys. We're here with Phil talking about what's new with heart Nissan Phil. What are some good reasons somebody should buy now? That's a great question. We all know that car shopping give me an overwhelming process. Plus, people are uncertain about a lot these days. Partisan recognize that? So we rolled up a heart rewards program. All new and pre-owned vehicle purchases. Get one year identity theft protection 3 Virginia State inspections and multipoint inspections. One year tire Rd Hazard with roadside assistance a three day. People exchange and every purchase or service earns heart rewards points. That's a ton of stuff. It's amazing. Offering all those benefits. It can really save people a lot of headaches and of course, money. Exactly. And we have even more savings right now. Get 0% financing on all new and certified pre-owned Nissan in our inventory. Phil, thanks so much for coming in. Hartnissan.com right, you got it. Hartnissan.com, or check us out on the Apple App Store or Google Play Store. Use your head and trust your heart. Maximal finance $20,000 for 60 months with Tier 1. And approval with MC dealer for full details.